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Welcome back to the
Welcome back to the basement yard Frank's wearing the merch. Look at that. Show it off. Oh, it's not a little dandery
It's not it's not for sale, but it's not it was it was it was but it's not
Yeah, so eat your heart out bitches and Frank is actually
But I am one of the bitches. Yeah, you're saying bitches. No because it's our shirt. So you don't have just you have one of these shirts
Or you don't I don't why can I can I I never asked can I ask sure why
What's the question like we went on tour. Yeah, and we had in our second tour
We had a lot of city-specific merch. Yeah, you famously took
none of them I
You took all famously took every single thing
I took like two and then I realized I'm gonna have a stack of these shirts
As a memory, but I don't really have space for it. I have a lot of storage in my apartment
You're gonna get to like when you purchase your first like I'm going to live in this home
You're gonna get there and have nothing
I'll be fine. I mean like I know you'll be okay because no, I have I have things
Oh, but like you have things like I remember one of the most jarring parts about going from an apartment to a house
Was like you get into the house and you're like, oh, I have nothing
Like you basically furnish two rooms. Yeah, you're living room. You're bedroom. Well, even that my living room now is much smaller than I plan on
Like a house living room. Yeah, that's crazy. It's gonna fucking y'all
Please like whenever you go look for houses send me the listing so I can see too
That'd be so sick, dude
It's not gonna be for a while. I think I think it's probably a lot closer than you realize probably like three years
um
Someone someone here's in trouble
Would you do? Well, how do you know it's me? What if it's you? That's certainly not me. I would have yelled at him already
It's never really him is it someone
So so we did the pastry on episode on patreon.com slash the basement yard where we tried pastries
From that I brought that you brought. Thank you so much
but
And forgot to get rid of the milk and left it out
Oh
My god, yeah
So I can see it curled from here. Oh my god. That's disgusting. I love a lamp of shit. I told aunt
He needs to open it and just take a sniff. Why do I have to do that? Are you gonna sniff it? All right
If you sniff it first, I'll sniff it. No, you sniff it first and then I'll sniff it second
And then you have a sniff it third. Come on solidarity. We're boys. Yeah, but you're a big prank boy
You gotta step that's why I'm breaking you you do it and let me see your reaction. Yeah, yeah, and then we'll do it for sure
No, you you're the one that's in trouble. I am promising to do it
Well, then you have to do it first because you got in trouble because you were a bad boy
If he brings it over there, I know he's gonna gag and I'm just gonna it's gonna. I know that's the best part of it
We'll go in order. It's perfect. Oh, yeah, it's a good idea. How did I get rubbed into this you got rubbed in look
Look look look look I used to I used to uh, that's a lasso
Which made of rope I
This is like my nightmare when I was younger. I had this thing with milk where I had to smell every I mean still to this day
If I were to drink milk you know the reason why that's full is because I opened it on the episode and I smelled it
And I didn't really enjoy the smell so I was like I'm not drinking that and that's when it was good
That's when it was like yeah, so now I'm like yeah, we're in a bit of trouble
Yeah, I just think that as Ant was the one that left it out
You're the one that's in trouble. So you should be the one to crack it sniff it
Yeah, but you brought it over there. That's true. I did it'll go cranky then Joe and then all but what what guarantees that you're gonna do it
Something tells me you're gonna be a little sneaky little
I'm not gonna say because somehow you got roped into me owing you money if I say the word
How do I know you're not gonna back down and not actually oblige and take a whiff
Well, if he smells it
I'll probably get beat up if I don't smell it. I mean
No, I didn't say that either. I think that we should I feel like I can see in your face that you're kind of gagging already a little
It's in my tongue like yo, it's in my tummy a little. I mean, I'm not gonna talk about it. Tell me dude. You're 30
stomach no, not 30. Tell me it up, baby. He goes to Disney enough. He could still use tell me that's fair. I
I won't just like I won't specify what it was, but we filmed something the other day and I legitimately gagged
Yeah, during someone explaining something right and like I was surprised because normal
I have a pretty good stomach. I don't I don't throw up ever
I'm like I could see things that are kind of gross or like smell things that are kind of gross
And I'm just like that's gross in that moment it legitimately made me gag and I was like
That was crazy. There's your line. That's my line. I guess let's see if this does the trick. Yeah
You got it. Oh, it's it's tight. Oh my god. It's so gross. It's tight brother
Honestly watching you do this is like kind of worse for me. It's not gonna blow up, right? People get it
Could you imagine it exploded in my face? I'm not kidding. I fucking leave. I'm not I wouldn't record be a short episode
Yeah, it would be a short episode
Give it a stink. Give it a stink stink. I don't think that's the word give it a stink
Should I smell the cap or the whole should I go nose the milk definitely the cap? Okay, here we go. Looks like you're ready
How am I doing this first when you were the one that you love it?
Relish it if right give it a stink now. I'm literally not doing it. Oh, no. We're all we're all upset now
You're upset now the look what you took from them
From the people you're edging they'll get over it. I'm not edging you are edging you're edging stop that. I don't like it
Here we've already gone on long enough
Is that bad huh? It's so bad. I didn't gag. I'll do it again
I think you like it
Third time third time's a charm. I think that's bad. Third time's a charm. All right. I'll third time it up. Third time's like it
I mean, I definitely don't but that's the cut
That's
Yo, what would you do if I had put a firecracker in there and it explode?
Hey, man, that'd be the last time you're on this
Oh, you two giggles. Why me? Yeah, you're giggly. That's true. Giggly puff over there. That's great. I'm gonna use that. Yeah
Oh my fucking god, too. I did too. You did too. No, I did too. You did too. Can I say something? This is so sharp
It like it is. It's like a shrew my fucking nasal cavity. What do you think would work better? Smelling salts are that to wake you up
Smelling salts. Okay. All right, but also I prefer that because this one's gonna make me like projectile vomit out of my sleep
They're designed to oh, it's actually coming. It'd be funnier if I didn't do it now, right? It would but if you don't do it
You're in bigger trouble. Wow. It looks way more like cheese than I thought
Just think of it as like it's barata. How much for you to take a sip? Joey said he'll pay you. No, I can't
I know I will literally pay you to not take a sip. Okay. No, I won't
Come on, just give it away. Sure. Give it a big one
Don't spill it. I'm not gonna spill
Whoa
Dude, it smelled way more like Aston cheese. Yeah, yeah, it's I mean it smells like a raw foot. Whoa
It smells like if someone dragged their foot through human shit. Well, I was really surprised. One more. I can't hit it back
Hit it back. Hit it back. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't look at him. He's gonna explode. Thank you
Oh god, that's crazy. Wow, that was
So I feel like your descriptions weren't as no it to me. It was so sharp like it hit it was sharp
It was so gross that I felt like I couldn't gag. Is that weird? Yes
I think that it's nasty dude like now that I'm thinking about it my stomach hurts
That was one of my fears when I was younger like oh, you know what just happened to me recently. Oh
We were on a shoot recently and I had I had milk and there was ice in it
I know like like milk. It's really cold. There's like short little shards of ice
But like the first time that I like you put it down your throat
Drink it. Yeah
The first time that ever had milk that had like a ice chunk in it. I thought it was chunky
Oh, it just like came out of me. That's bad. It's row up
But like milk was coming out of my mouth. I am more afraid of raw chicken than I am raw milk
Like I'm in a raw milk. First of all, I'm not gonna into that uh like spoiled milk
Spoiled milk. I feel like it's so easy to look at or be around spoiled milk and you go
Oh, that's spoiled. I'm not gonna drink this but like
You can see like a piece of seared chicken and then bite into it and then it's just raw worm in there
Yeah, that is like I saw once it was a picture that was like it's years old at this point from like ebombs world
But it was like someone took a bite of like a chicken sandwich and it was just in the middle just a
Basically cockadoodle-do chicken
Like
That shit gets me to the point where like and then I took a food safety class when I worked for target and
It just terrified me more. Yeah, dude like that shit is fucking crazy. I love that like every 10 years
You get a picture of like someone goes McDonald's and instead of getting a burger
There's just like a chicken's head and you're like how did this I remember that from like funny junk.com
Yeah, like those you're dropping crazy
Ebombs and funny just for us. It's so funny dating boys dating yourself a bit. Yeah, I mean listen
We guys have funny junk no shot. No shot. They had funny junk probably I mean
But he was like when we were looking at it. He was like five years old. So yeah, like funny junk
The last time I went to that website. See if it's still a website. Don't look that up funny
I mean, I wouldn't I wouldn't show it on the screen. Yeah, do it on your phone
But like it was like the ebombs world before ebombs world
There was all those websites and they had like offensive things on them
I feel like you you could have been like a curator. No, like um
What's the word?
Like a like a like a like a QAnon troll
Like you know like if you had like a different like set of friends like I feel like you could because you were really into ebombs world
I'm really trying to wait until you finish before I get angry about this because this feels like a backhanded compliment
No, no, no, you would be perfect. It's like a forechan
Yeah, moderator. Yes, fuck you
That sucks as a thing to say but like I think like you know you're like you like ebombs world
I like you love Spencer's like yeah Joey when I was 17 years old. I know that's why I'm saying even younger than that
I know that's why I'm saying like it could have led to that path
But I'm glad it didn't yeah, that's all I'm saying. I don't say there was there was a there was a money in that stuff
Like being a being a being like a moderator on like a big reddit thread or a forechan thread or something like that
I have eight-chan what I don't even know which ones there are there's a bunch of chance
The only one I remember is because of the the documentary they made about QAnon
Yeah, and it was like a person from like Thailand or something like that. Yeah
I mean, I have no idea whether they make mine or not. I'm just terrified. I feel like if
If we didn't go down this route, uh-huh
If you're saying that I would be like a like a moderator or something like that, which I'm not
more of like what I mean is like a troll in a way of like
You would almost like a hacker in a way like you'd be like a troller the only people that I like like
Like one there was no I mean I love pranks. I do. I love them so much
I feel like I would have gone the route of like Jamie Kennedy like having a prank show
Okay, what I'm picturing is you know that like meme of the face. It's like
Like the sideways face. Yeah, and it just like pops up randomly like I feel like
You could have went down that route. You know again. This feels like it's an insult
No, no, no, I'm saying like yeah, like pranks. I do like prank. Yeah, like like ebums world. You frequented chat rooms
That's not forget that you almost as a 13-year-old looking for companionship Joey bad place to look
I was here. That's
Don't sit here and point it at me like you didn't do the exact same thing. Whoa probably not as much as you
I did do it a couple times. I mean, uh, who how are we to measure the
you know
Time spent in a chat room. I mean, it's just we both did it. Yeah, you know
I remember I used to like because you remember on aim when you go to a chat room
Like you'd make one for you and your boys. Yeah, and it'd be like chat room 18604349
I would just take all that away and I just put one and I'd go in there. It was bad
Anyway, yo, this is the first chat room. Well like it was like a specific one
And then you'd go in there and it was just not healthy like it was like it was a petri dish of
Predators, bro. It's so weird with the internet like oh god
Yeah, not good. I feel like if I do that when we are younger
If I was who you're dumb and the internet was new and no one was policing it as you are now
What's the reason why when these things pop up people are like I'm gonna put my penis on it
You know like it's like you get chaperolette and it's like well, of course like you know
It's made is I'm gonna put a penis on it though like why is that going through people's minds because they're sick freaks
It's insane dude. They're sick freaks. Did you when chaperolette first dropped?
Did you like really get after it on there? No, I went on it a couple times
I put like I was not showing my penis on there. Let's make that abundantly clear. I would hope not I was going on like at the time
We were like maybe what like 18 or 19
When it came out. Yeah, maybe a little younger. Maybe look up when chaperolette came out
But like we'd go on there and be like you hope to see like a group of girls and then like yeah, I didn't happen
It didn't that was that that was quickly ruined by the creeps and purves on the internet
Yeah, it was released November 2009, but I don't know if it turned into what it was in a couple years
You know what I mean? I mean it was definitely 2010 2011 so so yeah around that time. Yeah, yeah
I mean
You're a tough year. You ever see the clip of someone like it's like Kermit the frog
And it's Kermit the frog and it's not really Kermit the frog
But it's someone pretending to be Kermit the frog with like a doll and she's like hey
How you doing? And there's like oh my god Kermit. Hey, how are you? And he's like yeah?
Fuck think about this and he holds up like a green cucumber looks like it's like Kermit
He's like, yeah, no, what do you think over my car? Yeah
Yeah, no
Just ruining our childhood
One one thing at a time. We were probably victims of predators at some point
For sure, I know I was I mean, I know I was too. I definitely know I tell the infamous story about Tiffany diamond
And mine was hey, it's me one two three oh three. Yeah, that one was that was see that one was a little different
You know, there was a woman with large breasts
sending probably
13-year-old me
Messages on my space and I'm like she loves me
Yeah, I mean Tiffany diamond you should at that immediately should have rang about like all the 12 though
Yeah, but like you you're not a completed eat it
I saw a giant boos and I was like I think that she thinks I'm hot. I was 12
She asked for ASL and you and what did you say? I don't really never give 12. I didn't give any information
It's just my mom saw it. Yeah, she wasn't happy
No, because she saw the news
Yeah, then I was like that doesn't happen and then it was it was happening at the time had was was going to happen
Yeah, you know like it was a thing. She never got anything out of me don't worry
Yeah, like all these people like I never like sent anything of me, you know
Like I never like told them my real name or like like how to find me or anything like that because that would have been a problem
What was the deal? It's me one three like was it a guy? I don't know what it was I I
I had no idea at this point like it could have been anything anyone
And you've never heard this story, right? I don't believe so we would for like on on AOL instant messenger better known as aim. Did you have a screen name?
I don't remember. Oh, bro. You're a liar. Oh, you don't have it. Yeah, that's crazy
I mean that there's people that haven't had screen names. No, I definitely did
I just I literally I just don't remember his a liar that means it was like my cock is huge my balls are bigger
Yeah, pounding Prisco one two nine might have been ten. Yeah might have been ten. What does that mean when I was 10 years old
It was I was probably what it was when I was 10 years old
I probably had the biggest balls on the planet dude. What that's not where I was going
I know I'm saying like that's what people said like it was like oh, oh, you know
It's what I'm saying like oh Aunt pre. Oh see this sucks. Why not just give them your social be creative
Which is what Aunt pre or was it cool war at the time cool war cool war
First of all what's cool about war what wars have been cooler than others the cold war cold one
But that was it was the coldest of ones
But what was what's cool war the one right before that maybe no no no before go you made the screen name
What is it about oh because my full name on Xbox was cool war monger
Or well, there's a war starting outside. Yeah, we're rumbling. Yeah, you're cool war monger. Yeah, who the fuck are you?
Yeah, I don't know. That must have been one of those auto-generated ones that like Xbox would give you when you would first sign in like
Hey, why don't you be like tomato rocks 18?
You know tomato rock pretty accurate. I like that actually. Uh, but
It was I went into a chat room and those chat rooms were all like
ASL ASL ASL which stands for
Is that like a disease? That's ALS
That's ALS
I mean
He's on something. He's not he's not far from it. Oh, man
Well, yeah, everyone was going in to see if anyone had ALS age sex location. Yeah, so you say your age slash your sex
Mm-hmm slash where you at yeah, so I'm in there. I'm fucking
13 m n y. You know what I mean?
13 years old male from New York got it so but then like someone if they like saw you
I wanted to talk to you they'd message you on the side
And I got a message from hey, it's me 12303 and they were like trying to court me and like ask for me
They like send pictures and like of your butt
I don't remember what they were specifically asking pictures for at this point maybe and
Other times I'm talking about this. I remember but I do remember very specifically they they asked me to like
Hey
Finger yourself
And my wrist
My response to them was where where you know, but let this be very clear because this is not a patreon episode
I just realized yeah
Yeah, internet predators are really serious and fucking dangerous thing. Yeah, I mean yeah, it's so like
It can happen to anyone even when you think it's not happening. So be very fucking alert stay off the internet
It happened to your favorite podcaster dude dude. I was home, man
But it was so like it was that person. I got any time they would sign on they would message me
That's disgusting. Hey, did you do it yet? Like I'm sure it was something sexual just falling up got it
Just just making sure it was it was circling back. Yeah, it's gross circling around. Yeah, disgusting
Really gross and we don't suggest anyone do any sort of thing. Yeah, I mean, especially like
I'm not gonna start naming names, but there are like certain places now where predators are known to hang out and target people and
Like online. Oh, I'm gonna start dropping names of places or games or something, but
It's a very serious thing like I don't want to be making light of something like
It was funny that it happened to me because like it was like at the beginning of when this stuff started happening
And as a kid I didn't know but like now we have the tools to know this shit
Yeah
And protect our fucking loved ones against it. So like very serious, especially
People are sick fucks out there
We started with spoiled milk and here we are. Yeah, and now where it's spoiled
No, no way to make that work. Speaking of milk, though. Did you see the RFK junior and Kid Rock video? Oh my god
I gotta say for
Kid Rock who has thrown out some anti-gay slurs before
That it was quite a gay video dude that's we're not gonna get into the politics of it all because that's not what this show is
I'm down to do that too. I mean
Fullscreen this bitch. Oh sure
The only thing I'm gonna need you guys to do is just tell me when to pause
Of course fullscreen it so yeah, so hold on before we even start. Let's let let me tee it up a little bit
Let's just say one thing
What's with the jeans? I mean work he doesn't take jeans. We'll get into that as the video goes as someone that has seen this
So for those of you guys that aren't from America and don't know
Luckily who these people are
RFK junior Robert Francis Kennedy Jr
Is like the secretary of health or something like that guys in great shape
I'm not gonna take that away from him
But it's said in tons of questionable things and made suggestions about ways of being healthy
Kid Rock
Not a shining example of American male health. Let me just say that. I know what I have never looked at Kid Rock and just gone
I wonder what his fucking work out
But outside his lungs are clear. Yeah, I mean he looks like he survived on
cocaine cigarettes and Jack Daniels for the last 25 years
But they posted this as like
A like motivational get up and get moving
Don't even know what it's what is it
Because it's like the whole milk part was just so weird
Play it and we'll just like kind of wait. I don't want to play the whole thing through so you have RFK junior on the left
Kid Rock on the right just play it. Okay. Let's start. We'll just start. It's it's a minute and a half long
Secretary Kennedy and Kid Rocks
Rock out workout. Pause it. Please. Let's start with this
We're never getting through that. It's okay, baby. We got a show here
They got me with the image of the eagle the bear and the great white shark. Really? I love those things those animals
Okay, those are cool animals are too easy, dude, but calling it the rock out workout
I just don't get what the point of this is
Just played
And it's like he's cheering he's like cheering him on like let's go work out and he's taking his shirt off
Which no one has ever asked him to do
And then he's serving food
Okay
Throw it wait wait hold on go back
Did he take his shirt off and have another shirt under it?
What no, I don't think so. What are you talking about Kid Rock? No
It looks like he was wearing another. Yeah
That was like a sweater knee and a little shirt underneath. Yeah
Okay, now he's just doing
Zero resistance workouts
Also bad form you're gonna hurt your neck there my friend
But yeah, it's like a workout video. Can we just like skip to the uh here? We go now we're talking
Oh, and then also this is great the assault bike in the the sauna and then also at a certain point he jumps into
The cold plunge fully in jeans. Yeah, let's pause here. Oh
Oh, let's pause here. Well now we know it's it's the cold plunge because the ice came in on the on the screen
Why isn't he why is he wearing jeans?
You I know you have not watched
Arrested development, but there's a character on that show that's a never nude
And he wears gene cutoffs everywhere all the time and like is afraid to be nude
And people are saying that our fk junior might be a never nude. I mean, I just it's very confusing
That he's doing this, but then at one point during this video. They're in a
Hot tub together and then it says
Whole milk in like drippy. I mean, you don't need it. You don't need to get a spoiler. We'll we'll get there. We could we could skip to it if you had
Well, first he jumps into the pool with more jeans and then yeah, he's got also got out of the cold plunge
Yeah, and now it's like whole milk and they drink whole milk with the drippy
Like what like what is that whole thing about like what is it about?
I think like there are people that are saying that like we have moved away from whole milk as a healthy drink
Not you. I love whole milk. I'll see who love whole milk. I'll tell you this
This does more damage to my whole milk appreciation than anything else. So maybe it's working. This is like
You know what it is there it is take another whiff. Oh my god. Please stop the milk
That was like the closest thing we'll get to like a hyper right wing heated rivalry
Like guys. That's what that is guys. Just just kiss
Yeah, I don't know. It's just kiss. No one's gonna like we'll be like accepting. I promise
I mean you might have said some things that maybe people will give you a little flack for a little bit like me. No, not you.
Oh kid. Yeah, yeah, but like guys if you want to kiss like
Well, I'll accept you. I think you will too and questionable. I just feel like it's like a weird video
I just don't know what it what it means like it's like let's we're gonna work out and then we're gonna drink whole milk and a hot tub
What well like what are we doing is that not the I I assume the idea of that is to get up and work out be more active
Is it I'm gonna ask you a question
You watch that does that make you excited to work out
No, it's I'm confused
What if I told you that it wasn't in this video because we don't want to get in trouble and oh money to kid rock
What if I told you that the whole thing was underscored by the song ball with the ball
Yeah, I did hear that
That doesn't that if anything that just makes it more confusing for me
And it's just like it's so funny the edit is so funny to me because it's just like the typical
Like
America thing. It's like eagles bears the flag
Home milk like what what are you attaching? I am just as confused by that as I am the several pairs of blue jeans that he works out
I think that was one pair of jeans that was
Wet then in the sauna and then back to wet again to be fair
Don't you kind of resonate with that a little bit. Yeah, you you're in there. Fuck you full jeans. You see that point by the way
Yeah, you know you saw it. You're in full
Tendona. I'm never I have never once worked out in jeans. However, I think now for
Experimenting maybe maybe we have to give it a shot. Maybe we need to go wearing wet jeans
I mean they were working out legs
Like they were doing they were also doing they were doing some back and shoulders in there
You know the blue jeans sitting in a car at one point like what this video the blue jeans of it all is the most confusing because
this is the type of like
Propaganda that does work for a very select group of people in this country
blue jeans
Like the whole like holding up a flag in front of a statue of lady liberty in your home
That was who that was that was the statue of liberty. Oh was it? Yeah, my god like and then working out in blue like
Like work out in my blue jeans like that does work for people
I don't know if I've ever had wet jeans on
Ooh, that's a good. I know I have because like I have put on like not jeans
I guess they're kind of like work pants over like sweat pants to go in the snow
Okay, so like those get wet why not wear snow pants
Oh, cuz I don't know any you don't have snow pants. No, why?
Cuz I don't snows every year though
Yeah, not enough to justify wearing pants one day a year
Just one pair of pants. I don't care enough for snow pants like it makes sense cuz you go skiing and snowboarding
Yeah, that makes sense to have snow pants. I it makes zero sense for me to have snow pants. I wouldn't say zero
Zero
Okay, you never had a full drink spilt in your lap wearing jeans. I've had it goes right through. I have
I think yeah, I have been wet penis all the way through. I have I have been caught
Whoa in like the rain in jeans and like the thighs get very wet
That's like the most uncomfortable feeling like I've got caught in the rain in jeans and I'm like
So uncomfortable. I can't imagine being completely wet. What are you talking about? That was like a very specific
I think I had a peanut collada just poured right through your jeans
So just a cocktail or a beer just went and just went right through
Do you like they landed on top? But you felt it in the back, you know what I mean?
You someone spilled a drink on your penis and you felt it in your ass
Like it was like you're like sitting in it. Yeah, yeah, it went right right through the whole thing
Yeah, I think I've had that experience as well. You got to buy better jeans then. That's such a story
No, no, he's right jeans are denim is very porous and absorbent
So I I feel your pain. I have felt it. I'm currently feeling it thinking back on it. Well, I appreciate you feeling it
Whoa, too, but he did I mean I feel like you set him up for that to be fair. I
is there a
Reality where we film a rebuttal one
you and I film about like
Rock out workout
Basement yard edition
And it's us at the gym you could be in jeans. I could be kid rock
You want to be kid rock. I don't want to be
But if someone has to be I'll take that bullet doing push it
Take that bullet and then we when we jump into the hot tub. What are we drinking?
Whole milk brother. Oh, what do you think we're just gonna remake it? I think we should do our version of it
Right, so that's what we wouldn't drink. Oh you guys would do like chocolate milk
Why would we drink that? I don't know because it's the opposite of them trying to
Be healthy milk, right? Isn't this the thing? I don't know. I don't even know what you're saying
Confusing it is. I mean, it's a very confusing like a fruit punch or something
Now I haven't had fruit punch long talking. I do have a thing of coolate out my house. No. Well, is that what you have coolate?
Oh shit, you want it? No
I mean, it makes sense. You have children. What am I gonna do with it? I mean, we haven't opened it yet
What was last time you had a Hawaiian punch? Oh too long brother, which I've never been to Hawaii
Something tells me that's not Hawaiian
like
Punch like real Hawaiian punch is probably not that color. I
I don't think that's
Like Dr. Pepper should only be working on peppers like
No, but like Dr. Pepper has it's like it's spicy because it's cinnamon in there, but like
Hawaiian punch is just in the name like I'm sure if you went to Hawaii and you were like where's the Hawaiian punch they to hit you
Yeah, I'm not gonna do that
Because I think it we're all under the assumption that it's just not it's not actually like Hawaiian. Yes, I know I
I it's been a while. I will tell you this
Here you go rank these and it could be any flavor you want whatever the best flavor is of these three drinks
Uh-huh coolate yeah Hawaiian punch Capri Sun high sea go
What was it again? Oh coolates number one cool coolates number one. Yeah, and what's your like flavor the coolers the cooler the jammer?
Oh, the one yeah, what that came in the plastic bottle. Yeah, and it looks like a lot of space. It looks like a spaceship or that too does
Uh Hawaiian punch is not made in Hawaii. Yeah, I mean you're the one
Just um I'll put coolade first probably Capri Sun second Capri Sun is up there
I don't like when they try to put coolade in the pouches like the pouch pouch game was a Capri Sun game. Yeah, that's it respect
Respect that they established yet
Um, then high sea
Okay, Hawaiian punch. What was the last other one was that the last one? Hawaiian punch coolade high sea and Capri Sun. Yeah, yeah
I'll put Hawaiian punch last really it's good, but like it also like I don't know if this is true or not, but I feel like I can't get cold
Wow, that's in a stooot observation like I've never had that in me like oh, this is cold
I don't think I ever called I don't think I've ever had cold versions of any of those true
Can you look that up actually because I wonder if that's an actual thing because I've like tested that before
I'd be like I don't know if I can get this cold because I put it in my fridge because it comes in in a fucking 30 gallon jug and you have to keep it in the fridge for four weeks
You want to get even remotely you want me to look up if the liquid drink Hawaiian punch can get cold. Yes, okay
Just make sure I have a I have a theory that it can't
The question I would write here is can Hawaiian punch get cold. Yeah, okay
I think it's it I think it's a great question and I don't like the judgment he's using I'm just I'm just clarifying I will tell you this I
If it's a top search sorry to enter right is it um, but yes, Hawaiian punch get gets cold
I went refrigerated or placed over ice. I don't believe you don't drink any of that shit with ice
But if you ask if other people are asking that
There's something there is you drink it out of either a cardboard box or
A reflective plastic pouch wait a minute it does say
The high sugar content acts as an anti-ferries meaning it requires lower temperatures than water to reach freezing states
So technically I fucking knew it the threshold of being cold is lower
Bro, I'm pretty sure that if you put Hawaiian punch in the freezer
It wouldn't freeze like vodka
I think I think if your freezer is set to 32 it might not but if your freezer is set to like minus two like most are
Then yeah, it'll probably freeze
I'd I'd give you like I'll say percent I've theory it's yeah, yeah, that's a that's such a fucking great point
To also piggyback off that I've never had a warm you who
Every you who I have had who I've had it really I mean they're on the floor
That was a stupid way of saying what I wanted to say
That was a very stupid way of saying that I meant like
Well, how are you drinking your youth?
What am I?
Those I missed all the context my at my mom's house
She would buy drinks like that that come in like cases or whatever and she would have them on the floor
Near the back door and I would just drink them like that they're on the floor
As if that was like oh, okay, my point is like they're not stored cold
But like cans I remember our friend always had oh the cans of freezing that was basically like
Be your for an eight-year-old. Yeah, because like you'd crack it and like
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Hmm, so what were we saying? I was talking about you who and how much I've drank of that I in high school
I would get it every single morning. I mean I I four years of you who you know I kind of damage
I've done to my body from like eighth until 10th grade every morning my breakfast was
A can of Coca-Cola and a BLT like we were not like you have Coca-Cola for breakfast
Yeah, oh
You what has more sugar? I can't a you who or a can of Coca-Cola couldn't tell you probably Coca-Cola
I would say Coca-Cola but it might not the margin might be slimmer than you like they're both bad
They're both like equally like Coca-Cola is like
Like 35 milligrams where you who might be in like low 20s low to mid 20s?
No, I think I know like a can of Coca-Cola Coca-Cola is
39 grams of sugar holy moly you who is 33
Holy moly again, so who's fucking who's fucking who yeah, you know
Did you know that you who has no milk in it? Yeah, yeah, they can't call it chocolate milk
It's like chocolatey drink chocolate drink. Yeah, it's weird. The trip me out. I'm okay with it. I mean it
I'm not I'm not looking to have it to like
Supplement my milk intake. You know what I
You know what I did once I put uh
It was a glass bottle of you who too and I put it in a bowl and then I put cereal in it. Oh
Yeah, duh. Yeah, I think of like cocoa pebbles or cocoa pups or something. Yeah
I was not a big chocolatey cereal kid, but I could see why that would
But you could also just do regular milk bro
What I would do to a cocoa pebble right now a fruity pebble bro, you get a fruity pebble in front of me
I'll say so I mean I'm down for some fruity pebbles and can you make it happen a
multiple
Serial taste test episode door dash right now. Don't do this half gallon of whole milk. Oh god. I can't we can't get more milk
And a bowl and some fruity pebbles so we can have some fucking fruity pebbles. I want to put my tongue through an apple jack. Oh
Yeah, yeah, I mean, I don't know. I'm not gonna touch that one. You know it though. You want to do it too
Not through an apple jack. Yeah, I love
Call me a sadist is that the one that loves pain masochist. That's it
I think sadists like like evil or something like that
But like I used to love putting a crunch berry between my tongue and the roof of my mouth and crushing it
And then it would just shred the top of my mouth like a cheese grater
I know you're gonna make fun of me, but let me get it out first the the honeycomb
I know you would suck through it all the time. I just say what did I just say hello call my therapist. I fucking knew it
I like sucking it and making it crush
Oh making it flat real like lat like those videos of like people putting things into like vacuums and then they like cut all the oxygen now and then just
I have no idea
Talking about I
Thought you were talking about the hydraulic machine that like crushes stuff. What do you think is by serving size?
The most unhealthy like sugary cereal
I imagine it's gotta be
fruity
No fruit loops I
Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure it's frosted flakes. Get the way dude. No, I've convinced myself
No
For worse or better that frosted flakes is like healthy adjacent good. It's so good. It's it's flakes. It's corn flakes. It's corn flakes, but it's like
It ain't fucking
But it ain't but it ain't the other ones dude like it's gotta be fruit loops
Cinnamon toast crunch has to be worse than frosted flakes because you're getting you're getting a thing of fruit loops
That is just every color that is not natural. I saw this thing that
A one of the cheesecakes. It's their most like colorically dense cheesecakes from the cheesecake factory up against other stuff
It's like a Reese's Pieces cheesecake or whatever. It's 1500 calories for a slice
What that's bad, but it's cheesecake. I'm gonna eat it. Yeah, I mean, it's probably delicious
I imagine that it's gotta be fruit loops at the top
It's so tough because I think like fruity pebbles, but
Yeah, why don't you look this up? This is very easy. I know I am. I'm trying here
Just pull up like the nutrition facts. I'm like the heavy hitters
We got
cereal crunch time
Honey crunch with nuts does anybody know that colds honey crunch with nuts? Anybody you think I am going into a grocery store
And I'm picking out honey crunches with nuts. I hope you take a gun and shoot me in the face
Well, it's saying that by weight that's 42% sugar
Yeah, and frosted flakes is 41% sugar and no
Like the bad. I mean saying by weight though a corn a cornflake is
Like papyrus. So of course, it's gonna be heavier because of the amount of sugar that's caked on
That's how you what my favorite bowl of frosted flakes is when you get to the end and then ages it down
But Bonsha that fucking dust in there. Oh, yeah. Oh my god. I'm not looking for by weight what the amount of sugar is
I was his hard. How are you not just looking at frosted flakes sugar cotton?
I'm trying to get a bunch of cereals at one. Let's just get the one. How much sugar is in is there more sugar in a Coca-Cola?
I mean into his defense
He needs to find like of comparable serving sizes so like if a serving size for this one is a third of a cop and that one
It's a half a cup like they're all it's cereal. It should be the same. No different. They you can quantify what a serving size is
Like yourself. It doesn't need to be okay. So I got a bunch of cereals
Serving sizes of 30 grams and their sugar content. It's kind of going by grams. I believe it's a bowl
You didn't see that rfk kid rock video. We want it in Fahrenheit
From what it looks like here frosted mini weeks at mini weeks frosted miniweets and captain crunch are the highest yeah at 15.7 grams of sugar
Whoa frosted miniweets I again convinced myself that those are healthy too
I like when I get a double
Or or when you get one that is just cover just the house is painted with this shit. Yeah, blizzard on this bucket like four coats of paint on this
Best. Oh my god. I love it. And then you get one that's like nothing on it. Yeah, why do I feel like I'm from Kansas or Kentucky
I'm meeting. Hey, what am I supposed to fuck out of here Dorothy? Wait that one has a lot of sugar in it. Yep
Captain crunch and frosted miniweets very high top two
They're tied in crunch. I can't crunch. I get I mean there's nothing real about that
And no, I would get it if it was oops all berries, which is the superior version
Frank, those are all cut dyed anyway. I know, but I'm saying like captain crunch like captain crunch without crunch berries is just those little yellow puffs
Yeah, but those are dyed, right? Yeah. Yeah
Like a piece of board. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right
What else we got? What the hell is the frosted flakes before I cut my own head off at the neck
I am a little disappointed with frosted flakes. I really thought Tony the tiger was saying they're great in terms of what how they were for you frosted flakes is
10.3 grams of sugar per
But what's the serving size 30 grams, which is what a third of so it's a third of the serving size of sugar
This is essentially what it's saying but and if a serving side you're putting like
Close to cop in a half and this fucking ball, baby. No, I'm not you're going to Frank whatever the biggest ball in my house is
Yeah, it's getting filled to the brim and then refilled. I love how we have somehow the all-new
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But you're in this with me now, baby convince ourselves that
sugary cereal is still in a way healthy. Oh, yeah, I Frank that ship is sale. I know I know
So frosted flakes is 10.3 grams of sugar per but fruity pebbles is 10
Whoa hold on hold on, but fruity pebbles is basically no no word. I'm on a diet now. I'm on a diet
Pretty pebbles. I'm on a diet. Yeah, if anything fruity pebbles
The thing with those pebbles better for you than frosted flight the thing with though is actually
It's probably not just because they're so small. Mm-hmm. I can get rid of the half a bag
Like yeah, but I'm going by serving size it all it all equates like yeah
They're saying a serving size a serving size of frosted flakes might be a hundred frosted flakes
Where serving size of fruity pebbles might be
500 because sure sure, but I definitely think I could eat the bag of fruity pebbles in two sittings
And the frosted flakes might take me I love fruity pebbles for the first minute and a half that I have that bowl there after that
It becomes it's like you're crazy. I like a little soggy cereal. No, I'm sorry
It basically becomes like toilet water like I'm it like stops up and becomes like a frank
If that's what toilet water tastes like give me a swirling. Yeah, okay flush it and let it drain it
You want it, but you want to head in there, right? It's crazy
Cinnamon toast crunch 9.7
Literally a diet literally that's crazy because they've also mastered what breakfast cereal is
We've said we've we've done this before and we'll say it again best cereal. That's the best cereal
That's S tier for you. Yeah, maybe sometimes you get a shrimp tail in there
Did that happen? Yeah, that was them
You don't remember that was a guy having lunch
No, the guy like poured out a bowl and he got like a cinnamon frosted
Shrimp tail, which I'm gonna go out on a limb. I would think it was like a sweepstakes. I'd say oh lucky. Oh shit
Yeah, well that we're we come from the days of like you open up a fucking
cereal box and there's like a PlayStation one demo disc in there. It does that not happen any now
They do like cracker jack prizes where it's like tear this paper off
And it's a fucking model tax book or some shit. I hated when fucking cereals like they don't have toys in them
And they're like all just you know mail it in for a rebate. I'm like bro. I still to this day
I have no idea what a rebate is and I'll tell you I'll I'm not participating. I'm never figured out because I know
I need to stand in solidarity with you. Oh, I need to we need to mail this in and then we'll send it
It's not happening. Yeah, you get a $200 mail in rebate. I'm not I'm not doing work
You want me to get up and do work after I just gave you all my money
I'm not paying for this for you to mail me money bet. What do we do? I'm like so what so in a month and a half I get a check
For a hundred bucks fuck you Kellogg's. Yeah, I'm not I'm not doing I mean
What are you so pensively looking up now just making sure if you ask for more cereals that I had any and I have none I mean
What are what what is another we need to know give me what I just
I don't give me honeycombs because or corn pops
I'm a little when corn pops used to come in the bag that looks like it was sent to space
Oh, they got rid of that. Yeah, it's an area 51 bag. Yes. Now. It's in a regular ass fucking bag. Oh my god. What takes such nuts? Yeah
um
Mm-hmm. I don't know what how many grams are going off of but it says 15 grams per serving that's not higher than I thought that's not that low
I was expecting it to be long pops are kind of ass come on now you like them. I kind of like oh apple jacks
Yeah, apple jacks are great apple jacks corn pops are like I like corn pops got to have my pops you know what I like kicks
Barry Barry kicks now we're talking, but that's another one getting crazy. This is dessert now
I know Barry Barry kicks like that was another one that was just like a healthier alternative like if you if you and
If you were elementary school and like someone found out you had kicks be like
All right, you all you what are you? You know, yeah, you think you're fucking the model of health
Yeah, do you know any grown adults that like non honey Cheerios?
Uh, no, I'm gonna go one step further Cheerios kind of suck
Honey not Cheerios are fantastic. Yeah honey nuts. They don't suck my nuts
You don't like honey nut Cheerios for real. Yeah, they could suck my nuts
Uh, frosted Cheerios. Oh
Well, hey
Time to grow up though. Okay, you graduated. You're the one that just said you need a box of fruity pebbles and two bowls
Who needs to grow up? I said I would eat it one sitting like a grown-up
And I also haven't done that in two years
That's recent but two years ago
I want like a little cereal kick because I was like, I'll just eat everything out because like I had eaten cereal in
It's okay to treat yourself a little bit
I'm just saying I fell into a hole and it was a deep deep dirt
Maybe
And it was a deep dark rabbit hole and I was just buying cereal and then I was just
Croshing God, let's get cereal in here. See this is why it's good that like we talk this stuff out
Well, just just let's get cereal in here is so stupid
No, but it's good that like you know if I lived alone. Oh my god. Yeah, it's like an idiot
Well, I did live alone and I did eat like an idiot
Oh, do you remember the big fucking boxes where it was like three of them?
Oh, well, you'd get them from like Costco
Yeah, I did it Costco and it would be a fucking like time machine box
And it would have three bags in there which you could never get back in once you open the bag
No, no once you once it's open and you open the box. It's done
And it would be like but see this is how they'd get you they'd put a shitty one in there
It'd be like apple jacks fruit loops and then fucking honey smacks or something or like rice crispsies
Which are good. I love rice crispsies. You gotta add sugar
I love hearing that shit fucking talk to you and like Spanish and shit like that
That's what I imagine like people that watch the turning point USA halftime show thought that the like bad bunny halftime show sounded like
Like snap crackle pop just like a like a bowl like those people are just like I'm not listening to this and to them it just sounds like
You interpreting the sound that rice crispy makes as his like Hispanic or Spanish
I'm saying I imagine that's what they thought it sounded like because they're the idiots. Not me. Right. I'm not
Yeah, what's your favorite cereal if you all right because we we've talked about it
Give us your top three
roster flakes. Yeah, number one. Uh, I think so I'm gonna change it. Well. Doesn't it you don't need to worry. I respect it. Cinnamon toast crunch. Yeah, and then respectful cocoa
cocoa pebbles yes
You know a puff guy
No, I'll tell you this. I don't know what it is because I'm 99% sure it's not actual fruit flavors
Tricks is amazing. I used to fuck with tricks when they were shapes. There's they're back to shapes brother
That's they've come all the way back to shapes because they were balls for a while
Yeah, when it was all balls. I'm like this is too much balls
They put a lot of balls in there and now they're back to shapes. I like shapes. I also love my lucky charms
I know grow up. I know I know I need to know I they're overrated, but I would never go as far as you know
Not very good. Oh, you know what sucks actually. I don't know if they suck
Golden grams dude if you like good and bad honey smacks or golden grams
Just do all we ate a lot of honey smacks growing up and but they taste like a old brown house
Yep
Like you would need to like read like a first edition of like the hobbit when you had that when I when I'm eating honey smacks
I'm thinking of
The original Wizard of Oz and like that bitch in the beginning that's like
Little dog like I'm thinking of her. Yeah, the neighbor whatever that idiot's name was
Wasn't she the witch? She ended up being the witch. It was played by my mother. Hey
Correct
I would imagine that like the people that ate honey smacks also like
Regularly had like framed burlap sacks on their wall and ran an antique shop and like played with tops
Pogs
What's that you remember Pogs? They were we they were right before Pogs
It was like 1993 1994
They were like little cardboard circles with like characters on them and like it was like
The slammer and it was like a card game. Oh, I thought you I thought you saying Pog like Pog like a
Never mind. You got it. You know, it's a Pog. You know what I'm talking about Pog. I'm gonna say now. You know. I know
What's a Pog? It's a it's a porn term
Okay, you've lost me. Well, it's spelled P-A-W-G. So all of you like come up with something
Is it an acronym for something? Yeah
Can't wait
Just so we're clear. This is frank figuring out for the first time what would a what a Pog is would a Pog
So it's it's it's P-A-W-G. So it's used as like an acronym an acronym, but like it's used to describe someone or something
both
So like
Without a hint it's gonna be tough pretty ass-wipe gentleman
Okay, you're like close, but gentlemen. It's crazy pretty ass
Widow guy guy
What the hell are you what was that Pog? Gee the guy the geezer guy guy. It's not widow guy
Okay, go back to the last one you did pretty ass
With no frank think racism. It's porn titles. Oh, I don't want to do that
We'll think of race
Think of race pretty ass white now. We're getting somewhere gay
No, no, no
Pretty ass white
There's one other G word. I think there's no there's two there's two other
This is a don't overthink it. It's like you know, this is the thing that's happening between a this and that
A pretty ass white girl. Yeah, but the it's not pretty
Think 90s think 90s posh
posh you think it's spice girls know no think 90s and like cool like oh, that's cool. That's that's
No, with a pee with a pee, but it doesn't sound like a pee. It doesn't sound like a pee. No, it sounds like a different one
If you ask always it fat
Oh, that ass white girl. That's mean. No, it's about her. It's about the butt. It's about the butt. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's not like
It's not like a fat ass. Oh, it's like a fat ass white girl. Oh, oh, that's a porn term. So when you said pugs
I was like what no, this is P.O.G. Yeah, different P.O.G. Yeah
Um, and I would say P.H.A.T fat it was like an early to mid 2000 thing because I wasn't fat farm
All right, right, right, right. Yeah, my ears were off. Yeah, because I fat farm. I remember I remember in
Meet the fuckers
Where he goes into or maybe the second one or whatever the fuck or maybe that was
Yeah, it was the parents was the first one meet the fuckers was the second little fuckers was the third
It was the second one and then he goes into like the kids bedroom and he's like oh a little Kim. She's fat
P.H.A.T
I always remember that
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Um, all right, so
What the hell were you talking about?
You were talking about you were explaining hogs
Yeah, can you look up the 90s hogs just to show him you might know if you might recognize it
Like a like a it's the it was like a little like cardboard circle and like it was like a game and like it came with like the power
Rangers on it Jurassic Park oh
The game do the game did you say you had another one of these games? Oh, you want to you want to riddle?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, fuck. I hate these goddamn riddles
Okay, so all you have to do is tell me how many horses are in the stable
What what stable
Whichever stable is in your mind how many horses are there? Okay, ready three
What it didn't happen yet oh here we go
How many horses are there I counted six one two three four five
Are these multiple are you mind maybe actually I'm gonna say two I said nine there were five
Come on now five there were five all right, okay
I'm I'm gonna fucking walk because you know I hate these and you guys this is what happens
I'm not even on this one
You guys get them first and then I have to sit here like an idiot
How about now
Three three
There were three I got it you got it. I got it. I said three two just because he said it
Now
You go first six I said three
One
I'm gonna get very angry, but I'm I'm trying to push son of a bitch shut up
Can you get it this time
Six five there were six I got it now how how I have it I got it
Hit me again
It's not what I don't
Slow very slow. Please one two three one two last try
Five
Two there were two oh my god. I'm so got it. I'm so got it. I got it
Hey, I got that fucking phone you want to try again
Do you well, what do you think's going on? It's got to be something that you're doing with your hands that has to be
Has to be something I'm doing my hands. All right, so put your hands down and do it. Well, I can't because so it is his hands
So it is his hands go again
Okay, go ahead
That was how many horses are there now
Seven
There were six I swear to god. I'm gonna flip this fucking table over. Well, how'd you get to seven? Yeah?
What was seven I'm watching his hands and then he he went like this
So I thought it was like an upside down seven
So do it and keep your hands here all right all right
Okay
Stop uh fuck I lost that I blinked you blinked again. Start again. That matters
What about ten now?
Ten ten. I want to say three. It's three
Come on guys. I figured it out. Oh, I like being in on inside jokes when I'm inside them, but you do
I don't know how much more I can help you want one more. All right
Make it off as obvious as you can
Three
Two three now three
Three minus two plus one
so
Two
How many two it's like it's like it's like it was one it was one
Wait didn't I say two because you did one two three so it's that yeah minus that so three minus two plus
one
So two okay, all right you maybe you're getting close you're not here we go
One two three four no it doesn't matter ready
How many horses are in the stable now
Is it like is there multiplication involved
So three plus three times two twelve eight
Can I do it sure good to do it too. I'm gonna get you to get this right and I'll answer
I'll answer now now when you split fucking second to take a sip. Yeah, what is that? What are you drinking by the way? It's tea
That's tea
Looks like dehydrated urine
Yeah, maybe it is looks like something from Jurassic Park that would attract you
It's sparkling tea
Ready
How many horses
Six I think there's three
No, right. Okay. How do I how do they're worth three? Yes. Yes. Okay. How do I good luck? Okay. Here we go
Oh
Now three I think there was one
You know there's one I know there's one
Frank why am I doing this?
I it maybe it's not so it's it's the cycling of these so it starts with snaps and then it goes to a different cycle
And then it goes to a different cycle so that's three different cycles
Think about think about the other time
I'm gonna fucking come over there
Poor that milk down your fucking
I'm gonna pour that milk down your fucking throat. All right, Joe. Maybe you just gotta go real slow try again. Okay, ready
How many horses
Three yes
Okay, try it again
Now
Three
There's one
Why was there one why was there three before I guess I thought you were on it
I get I fucking hate these little bar tricks you go to fucking bars too much you fuck and you fuck you too
I don't know you know what this you earn a bitch here
Right that down you don't bitch
Um, can you just tell me yeah, I guess just reveal it now all right wait wait
Let me do it okay, and then you tell me how many horses there are how many horses I are in the stable okay sure
How many two I thought I was I was thinking like five
But I don't know how I
Why would we both say to yeah, we both said too
Had we come up with that same time
Think about everything yeah
I'm gonna do it again. All right, but then count down from three and we'll say it at the same time. Okay. Yeah
Three two one zero. Yeah zero. I guess
Okay, all right now we have to tell him
It's just the amount of words you say after when you ask the question
I
Fucking hate that's why would you are like so do it again do it again do it again do it again like
How many horses three yeah, you had to count that
God good job. That's why he was like how many horses were in the stable my hands are underneath. I'm like
I hate that so much. Yeah, I just don't I
Because you know why because I fixate on one thing there. Yeah, and I think like there's something in that thing like the hand things
That I'm not getting I always think that when he brings up one of those that it's like it can't be the obvious one
So I'm trying to think of everything you think that because I don't so that's why you get it and I do not I fail
It was fun from the side of the club for sure. Yeah, you pointing at me and saying that I'm stupid
I'm not kidding take another whiff of that milk right now. I feel like pledge do it. I feel like that
Do you think that's like a very offensive thing someone said like could say to you
That you're stupid. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but like obviously he didn't
He obviously didn't say it in a serious manner. No, no. Yeah, I'm not
I don't think you're stupid. Well in that moment maybe
I'm kidding. I would say that like
It's so tough because like if some random listener said like this guy's an actual fucking idiot
Yeah, I wouldn't care, but like if someone knows the real person that I am and yeah
I think you're stupid you're just stupid or like you're not
smart
That I would you know me I would go into a fucking well that's what I mean
I feel like that that's like would that would offend you more than like other offensive things for some reason
Yes, yeah, because I think like that is a level of like
Like
Like you need to really not know me to think that I'm flat out stupid. You know what I mean like
Defending wise not stupid. I don't need to defend why I'm not stupid
I know and the people that know me like that's the point that I'm making is like the people that know me know I'm not stupid
So like if someone were to say it like if joy would say like seriously like I just think you're dumb
I'd be like what the like you know me you know I'm not
You know what I mean. Yeah, I agree. I think it's tough because like so much of this podcast is us like assuming or not even assuming
Confidently stating we know something and then being proven wrong. Yeah, some of us lately. I've been on a roll
That was the last episode and having twice
It's two more than the one before that. That's right baby
Well anything up from zero, but like it's now become like a thing like we do it as a joke
You know, which thing like the like these guys know nothing where it'll be like oh the queen and it's like who
You know, and now it's become like a whole pudka pudka a whole podcast like some genre
Of like people just not knowing like guys just not knowing things and people think that's like a bit that we do
Yeah, I mean, I definitely like know a good bit, but I definitely say things confidently that I'm not sure about
I also don't doubt myself as the smartest person in the room today like
Ranked the three of us in order of intelligence. Oh, yeah, that's really to I honestly would say we're all in equal levels
I really would like me to try and say say what you want about the next thing that's coming out of my mouth
Well, yeah, I had no knew and then as I've been getting to know you more. I'm like he's a smart kid
Oh, so at first you thought I was a no, I just didn't know you, but like as I've gotten to know you
I can be like wow he's he's like you're very well spoken
You know a lot about a good amount of stuff like
But like I didn't know you so I couldn't have said that you know what I mean. Uh-huh. Are you smart?
That's for other people to decide I think yeah, how are your grades growing up?
Very good. I don't think that's the I don't think that's the standard
No, no, I'm just because I know people that had great grades that are just fucking idiots
It's fair. I think I think to be smart. You need to be well
Like you need to be well versed in it like that well versed
But like able to hold conversation and stuff and also a part of being smart is knowing when to say like I don't know
And we that's a part that
As it left your mouth you're like well, that's not
What we do at all
Yeah, but like that they're getting they're not getting the real versions of us
So good, you know, you got to be able to be like no, I
I think there are things that you guys are like no more about than I do as there are things that I know more about than you do and stuff like that
But like I think in terms of like
our
Capacity for intelligence. I would say all of us are pretty close
Like I wouldn't I don't think I'm smarter or dumber than either any of you guys
What am I done?
Well, why did I bring that up now there are other people that we know that I have full-on called idiots
All right, yeah, you know
That was so funny. Oh my god, dude. They got me good
Well, you have to know when to say I don't know
That's important
Which we don't know but like
Intelligence is also like
your
Like
Desire to also like your capacity for learning like and willingness to learn
Like people that are just like I know what I know and I'm not learning anything else
I don't care about other perspectives. I think that is a form of an idiot
A form of an idiot. Yeah, it's one of the genres. It's one of the genres
Yeah, who do you think is the smartest in the room?
Uh
I don't know. I was just doing have to start the pot. I was hoping you had a snap answer. I know. Hey, we'll give a real answer
The smart answer is no answer
Like you gave we're all in the same. I mean, but if we're also going to be technical we do need to look at
Levels of schooling if you're saying what are you?
Well, let's just let's just let's look at the let's find a way
Let's call a chick in a hen. You know what I'm saying. Yeah
What exactly? He doesn't know it. Yeah, I don't we got it here. Don't don't drag me. Where do you have a degree college? I do
He does in what finance? Oh, that's right and I'm mining an economics
Wow, that sucks
Was it a lot of numbers? No, it's not fun. Where do you go to school? Cargolis
Come on, please give it to me. I can't please. It's got to be more creative. Please give it please
Where did you go like pace or something? Baruch in the city. Oh Baruch. You're not even gonna give me a satisfaction. I can't
Gargolies be more obvious
Gargolies
You went to Baruch. Oh, let's just try it. Let's try that one more time. Sure
Oh, he's gone. Yeah, no there's over now. No, it's fair. Where did you go to school?
It's suck on these suck on my balls
What did you say gargolies? Gargolies. Gargolies. Oh, so
Where you you went to drag them?
Drag them. Yeah, what's drag them? Drag them across your nuts
You mean drag your nuts across the face?
Drag them across your nuts. Does that mean you're dragging your balls across his balls?
Where do I fit into all this? What's going on dude? You mean drag them across your nuts?
Oh my god, it's like an alien
It's like an alien that just learned how to make that joke. Yeah, right
I was like if you act like an AI to make a joke like that. Drag them across their balls and mine
Are you crying? Oh my god, your face is wet
In that moment, I was the dumbest person in the room there. We're back. Yeah god
God, that was fucking fine. You mean drag them across your fucking nuts
Oh
Dragging nuts across nuts is fucking
That's so fucking funny. Oh, man. Oh my god. That's my favorite part of this episode
You've cut everything else out. Well, there you have it folks
That's our episode for this week. Frank, where can they find you in your nuts? Oh come on
Let's be mature. Let's be mature here. Okay back to being the three smartest people in the room
The Frank Alvers all over social media and
patreon.com slash your basement yard
Okay, we're gonna find you in find me on ant prisco on Instagram
Ant pre are you on stuff these?
What's what's stuff these stuff these nuts in your fucking mouth
Something's nuts to your nuts sack
You're you would be you would be the gay one with my nuts in your mouth
Um, you guys can go follow me at jose and i got to go follow the show at the basement yard and that is all
God, that's so funny. See you next time
The Basement Yard
