380. Alyssa Neilson

0:00Hi. Hello. How are you? Good. How are you? It's nice to meet you. It's so nice to meet you as well. Do I see a likened piece? You do see a likened piece. You do. How did you bring that all the way to Los Angeles? They deliver. They ship. Yeah. Oh. Oh, that's a specific piece. Yeah. It was really big when it arrived. It was like an massive six foot tall box, but they do shipping and it was like 50 bucks. Oh, great. Yeah. It's so funny because I remember during lockdown, so all the list was out there. Alyssa has the wavy. What would you call it? It's like room divider. Room divider. Room divider. Yeah. Who thought of it as like a closet, more like a changing room divider or something? It's like very New York. Yeah. I'm actually like, I have a very ugly in the wall AC unit and I don't need it for like 11 months

1:04a year. So I just hide it with that. So it's like underneath that. You can't see it. Yeah. I love. It's like from the 90s. I don't like how it looks. Totally. Totally. Perfect for hide and seek. Yeah. The house. I mean, it's, that's actually pretty interesting. Yeah. It's some of the things that you may have in like apartments or houses or so ugly. You got to find ways to hide it. And that is actually a perfect solution. Yeah. No. Totally. And then I just move it on the days of the year where I need it. But yeah. It's pretty easy. I wonder what else you have. And I feel like you have like the most architectural digest type of Los Angeles home. I don't, the home itself, I don't love, but I love everything I've put in it. So I've done a lot of work. I do have really good stuff. I'm always on Facebook Marketplace and LA is like a great place to always find stuff. I drive around at every weekend and I always find good estate sales in my neighborhood.

2:09So a lot of it is just like random, but it all works together really nicely. But I do. Yeah. It's something that you have to have a comfortable home. It's just one thing I won't compromise on ever. Oh, especially in Los Angeles, I feel like once you find the perfect home, you have to like, I'm sure we're going to beat the allegations of all this like driving. Yeah. We're going out and then like if you're going on dates or like, are you sure like double checking or else I'm just going to stay in my lovely abode. Yeah. The thing I love the most about living here is that it's the city where I get the most space out of everywhere I've ever lived. So that's really nice. Like the homes are bigger for the price. But also, yeah, I'm actually not home that often because the weather is so nice that I'm always outside, but I still want to have a comfortable home. I don't know. It's weird, but I've lived in places where like your home all the time for like several months a year just because it's like so gross outside or whatever.

3:10So it's definitely like you just learned to have a really cozy home. I love that you're out and about like checking out like a state sales to lay. I could only imagine like the hidden gems you find. There's so many. I mean, a lot of a lot of estate sales. I mean, you have to like be subscribed to them. A lot of the good ones have like lines down the block. But sometimes you find nice ones, but like sometimes you also see really nice houses that have like stuff outside and you pull up and it's all really bad stuff. So that's also there's a lot of like dubs when it comes to that. Like I do that all the time where I go and I'm like, how does someone have such a beautiful home and they have like horrible target clothing like I just don't understand it. That happens actually like several times a week where I like pull over park and then it's all just horrible crap. And I'm like, you've had this in this beautiful home. Damn. Yeah. I know that vintage is like such a huge thing in California.

4:13It's just been this ongoing debate about who is the best vintage New York or California. But I think what's so crazy is that like, I know this country has so much qualms, but like one good thing is the the vintage sales are great like the most you're drinking out of. Yeah. I think that the best vintage is actually not in New York or LA. And like the middle of nowhere, um, outside of those two cities, like I actually have brought a lot of stuff to LA from Houston, just because it's also just retailed at like a normal price. Um, so I love that if it's small enough like a small like sculpture or something, I will buy vintage in Houston. I'll just bring it back in my carry on and like these like little trinkets for my home are like $7 there, but here they're like 200 for some reason because people will pay anything here. Um, so I actually think you have to be like in the flyover cities or you have to be in like, I don't know, you have to just be like in the middle of nowhere, like a suburb

5:17or something to find like really great stuff. Totally. So you're from Houston. I am. Yeah. Texas. How many times you, or do you sell family back there or how many times do you go back? I do. This past year, I've gone back like, I think like 10 times. Which is actually crazy or maybe nine, but it's, it's really crazy. It's the most I've been back since I've like left my parents house actually. Um, I was working on a project when I was at Spotify for several years for the Houston rodeo and my parents actually don't live there anymore. So my parents live in two different places, but my little brother just moved back about a year and a half ago after law school. So now I have like him. So that's really nice. But I was leading this project for the Houston rodeo for several years in a row at Spotify. And I just like fell back in love with it, like just from that. Um, and I had to be there for like three weeks every March for like three years straight. So I really love that.

6:18And I just started going and I, um, yeah, I started like a home buying process there and all that stuff. So I've just been going back like every three, four weeks and I just love the like, it just feels so calm compared to LA. So it's just like easy to be there for me. Okay. Back it up. Back it up. This is awesome. I love that you can totally fall back in the town that you can, that you grew up in. I think that's phenomenal. And it's like awesome. That like a career or a job is like the thing that like sort of bridges that, which is really cool. And we got to talk about this home buying process to like what? Yeah. I love it. I love it there. If I had like economic reason to be there, I would be there. Like I always say to people if I was like a first grade teacher, I would live in Texas. I wouldn't live in LA. Um, but yeah, it's, it's nice. I mean, it's definitely, I'm not like a hometown hater. Like I love it there. So I have so much fun there.

7:19I have a lot of friends there still, um, everything is like half the price. So like, it's easier to have fun in my opinion. Um, and it's just like less intense and less dirty and grimy and, I don't know, I love it. But yeah, I started looking for a home like in October, um, late last year. And I just like realize, okay, like, I don't know. I think in my head, I've like completely written off home ownership because I've spent most of my adult life in like LA, New York and even in Europe and Amsterdam, things are pretty expensive for like European standards. So I just never really thought I would own a home. And then I just started going back home to Houston and I was like, Oh, like I can definitely do that here. Like duh. Um, so I started looking and it's, it's going well. It's definitely affordable, which I love. And I feel so bad for so many people that I know who their hometowns like are in affordable and they can't really go back. Um, cause I know so many people like that. And I feel like lucky that my hometown is like still very affordable and isn't like the boonies either.

8:19It's like a nice hybrid of like, there's stuff to do there, but it's still really affordable. So, um, I started that process back in October, it's still TBD. But yeah, it's a lot easier. It's like literally one ace, the price of my neighborhood in LA. So yeah, totally. So is Houston, so Houston's giving Abbott Elementary, if you go back, will you keep on doing what you're doing or is it going to be a whole 180 or yeah, I wouldn't live there full time to be honest. Um, but I like the idea of like that I could, if that makes sense, like if anything were to happen I could. Um, yeah, I mean, if I live there, I definitely would try to do my own thing just because it's, I feel like it's easier, like again, like it's like a lot riskier to do that here. I feel like you also have like increased competition here. Um, so I liked that. I also just like had me weird fantasies about opening a store there because I feel like it's starving for sheikness. Um, so I would actually love to open a boutique there, but I don't know anything about

9:22like how that would work or I don't have any actual plans for that, but I think that would be a really cool opportunity to bring a lot of this like more elevated fashion curation to Houston because it's, it's not really a thing there as much, um, and there are definitely people into that there, but they just come to New York and LA every few weeks to like shop or they just like look to the coast for everything and I'm like, no, it should be here. So I also would love to do something like that. What started striking your fancy of like doing all of this, I mean, I know going back to Houston, but like, has there been like this ceiling in Los Angeles that because I feel like Los Angeles is coming back, right? But in a different way, I feel like every year someone's saying this, um, even with New York, but yeah, I don't think so with New York right now. I think New York is really just shaking towards core, um, it, it truly shows, but with LA, I know that like, it's like, has its ups and downs currently.

10:25Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I think for me, it's just burnout, like I got really burnt out last year and I just kept going back, um, and I don't know, I, I think that's the biggest driver of it. I think that like life here is very intense and I've struggled a lot since moving back from Europe a few years ago with like the level of intensity here. And I lived in LA 10 years ago almost for about a year and like some change, like maybe like 14 months, I think. And I loved it because I came from New York at that time and it was so calm compared to Brooklyn that I was like, this is amazing. And then now coming from Amsterdam, I'm like, this is really intense. Um, so I'm like looking for a retreat away from LA and I feel like I've found that in my hometown. But I, yeah, it's really just like the intensity and, um, I don't know, a lot of the, the tropes of like the opportunist culture and like the social climbing, it's, it's, it's exhausting. So I, I enjoy being somewhere where like those things don't really exist. Um, and it's like not important and like I have, I have friends in Houston that I've hung

11:28out with like 20 times the last year and they don't even know what I do for, for work or like where I work or anything like that. And that's just like really nice, in my opinion, totally. I can't agree with you more because where are you from? I'm from Philadelphia. Um, I love Philadelphia. I'm a Philly Sandubb. What's so fascinating right now is that going back to the social climbing, the social climbing today is way worse than like in high school, like when you're like battling all these like, like from like, I don't know, this, I guess there's like the popular people and then you wouldn't care. But now it's like all everything. Yeah. Yeah. It's around you. Right when you look at it, I'm like, what is going on here? Yeah. Yeah. No, I love that. I love that. Like nobody cares about those things in certain places. And like when I'm in Texas, I just wear like an old like UT Longhorn t-shirt and like

12:30some Nike pro shorts and I just go out like that. And like no one's like looking at me or like, it's just casual. I love it. Um, where I would never wear that like out in my neighborhood and I like, I just wouldn't do it. But it's intense. Yeah. And I really like Philadelphia. I actually would live there. It's really nice. I think it's such a nice city. It's so pretty. It's close to New York. It's affordable. Like it's like beautiful. It's walkable, which I really care about. So yeah. It's all those things. But I love right now that we're pushing other city propaganda right now on this pod. It's great. Yeah. And my dad lived in Philly for like five years when I was like in high school middle school. Because my parents got separated and he moved to Philly for his like new wife and I spent like summers there. And he would like take me into the city to like, you know, the museums and like to get like cheese steaks. And those are like some of my earliest like high school memories of like spending eight

13:32weeks a summer there. Right. And he like tried to sell it. We would go to like sporting events and like the Liberty Bell and like all that stuff. But it's such a nice city. It's so cute. And it's walkable and it like feels very old and historic and beautiful. And so I'm like into that. That's good. Okay. We have set the stage. I know where you're at right now. Hey, everyone.

14:35This is where many hats presented by Desar and Matzar with your host Rashad Rostom. You can find all our episodes on all platforms and that where many hats dot com. Where many hats is made possible by listeners like you. Thank you. Alyssa Nielsen is a social media and brand marketer running her independent practice studio and marine based in Los Angeles. Alyssa's clients include Glacier, H.E. One, can you forks and more? Check out Alyssa's grid posts for all things shopping edits, what she thinks about getting dressed, wellness and life in Los Angeles. Have Tandon, please welcome Alyssa Nielsen to wear many hats. Thank you. Thank you. That was great. Sure and sweet. Yeah. Nothing too crazy, nothing too crazy. But I do love that given given all the posts that you've had online and just like putting all the pieces together, it's like LA coded but I'm glad that you're going back to your

15:39roots. Yeah, I do love LA so much. It's like the perfect lifestyle in my opinion if you can swing it. It's such a nice life and I've been here now, I've been back here now for almost four years, which is really flown by because I moved back in 2022 at the end of that year. And yeah, I think this year, I'm like at three and a half years, which is flown by and I don't know, I'm always inspired here, but you just need to break sometimes, I think. And before that, you were in Europe. Yeah, I was in Amsterdam for three years, like exactly three years. Yeah, I didn't really make it that long. That's pretty long to me, huh? Yeah. Well brought you along enough. Love, yeah, my partner, yeah. So he's from there, so nothing crazy, I wasn't just like exploring life after New York. I actually wanted to live in New York for the rest of my life, but life had other plans for me. I was actually really excited to live there. It was really fun and I miss it a lot, but it just wasn't like my lifestyle that I wanted.

16:46Yeah. I've never been to Amsterdam. I've always wanted to, but every time I hear someone moving to Europe from the States, I always want to know like what is the factor, obviously not being like, or what's your opinion, Paris moment, yeah, a lot of people, when I tell them I moved here from Amsterdam, like I still get people weirded out by that, they're like, when you move back, like now in this administration, I'm like, well, no, like, yeah, like people are kind of freaked out about like why I would come back, especially with a kid, but I didn't like living there. As much as I really thought I would. And then when I moved there, like in 2020, everyone was like, you moved here from New York city, like they were all like, why would you move here? So I feel like everyone hates where they are and the things that you should be like, and the grass is always greener basically, but yeah, I knew after the second month, I didn't want to live there.

17:46So I lasted like pretty long time after that, but it was not great, yeah. Were you still doing what you were doing in New York in Amsterdam? I tried. So I moved in COVID. So that had like so many challenges, obviously there was like a very delayed walk down period in Europe, if you can recall, but like the pandemic got really serious in 2021 there versus like 2020. So there was like no economic activity, and I also had like visa paperwork and like restrictions on working and stuff like that for like the first year and a half. So I really didn't do anything, which was nice because I got this sort of like very European maternity leave, it felt like very Scandinavian, like I didn't go back to work until my daughter was like 16 months old or something. And we would just like take the bike and like walk around. And a lot of things were like open halfway or like window service only, but like I would just walk around with my daughter for like a year and a half. And I got really into cooking there because I love like the grocery shopping there.

18:49It's so much more affordable and so much easier than here. Once you hack like the language, it's pretty easy. So I just got really into cooking and just like walking and just hung out for like the first year and a half. And then I started going back to work and I worked in advertising for about a year and a half in Amsterdam and Amsterdam, yeah. Was it an agency there? It's an American agency, very popular agency from Portland, Oregon. Oh, we are, that we all know and love. Yeah, exactly. So I worked there, which was nice because it was like everyone who worked there was American. So that kind of gave me this little like almost like an embassy or something of people from New York and Portland. So it felt homey and I loved it, but I wasn't on like the cool brand that everyone associates it with. So that's so funny. Yeah. Yeah. It is kind of again, going back to social climbing and popularity.

19:54It's so funny that like even with the things that people do in their their job or whatever like that, they're like wanting the cool brands to work with and like, no, yeah, it's it whatever happened to IBM, like whatever happened to like like like boo, you know, but you're still just doing the thing. Like for an example, I every time I go to my friends coffee shop and I'm chilling, I got I have like Gen Z people come up to me and they like talk to me about like their lives and whatnot. I'm like, you know, it's like 12 in the afternoon, right? This is like the definition of like, you should be at work and it's so funny because like they have been telling me some funny things being like, I don't want to go back to like, I, there's other jobs are out there like looking that want me, but like, I don't really

20:55want to go back to office and I would have to tell them like, you know, before you were born. Yeah. I worked five days a week in an office. Yeah. I'm right there with them. Like I don't want to work in an office ever again. For sure. I mean, look at us. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But that's like very nice. Like when I was at Spotify, we were remote. So I got really like I kind of, I got my job right before I moved back to America and I like did the final interview like the day we arrived to LA and I started like a month later. And so my whole LA experience kind of like was on the hinges of like working in Silver Lake where I live, not having to be in a car. And that's like the only way I'm willing to live here to be honest because if I have to go back to an office and I would definitely move to like Philadelphia or New York where I could just get on a train or walk because it's horrible. I did this freelance job that I just ended like a month ago and it destroyed my health just

21:58from going to Santa Monica like I'm never going back here again. It was the worst experience. It was really bad and like I tried to always explain this to like my boomer parents like my dad worked my whole life like in like downtown Houston and like would like drive an hour from like our suburb in traffic and he would like leave at like 6 a.m. every morning and he like doesn't understand that that's just not a way to live in the modern day and work doesn't really require that like you can take like I was literally taking a computer from home in traffic for two hours each way and I was like this is so bad for the environment it's bad for me I feel like I'm on a flight like if I have to use the bathroom I'm like I have to hold it like it's just awful and it just destroyed my health my car started acting up like it was like what are you doing to me and I mean every day I would come home from that job and I had to go three days a week and I was just like falling asleep at like 9 p.m.

23:00I had to sleep like just so exhausted and I would like go like it would take like an hour and 50 minutes to get home and it would just be my car would be going like three miles per hour the whole time like it's just awful like I don't just a hit send yeah and I there was one point where I was like I think I could literally run home faster than this like I could get home in the 12 miles maybe faster than this car it was that bad yeah yeah are you still in Silverlake I am yeah I love Silverlake I usually stay in Silverlake or Echo Park when I'm visiting LA sometimes right now Beverly Hills but random random but what's so fascinating about like that like Silverlake and Echo Park right now it constantly changing left and right yeah you've been I'm sure you've been like the the unnecessary drama

24:05that's been happening do you do you how often do you go out to like restaurants and LA I don't I really don't I I so for me I don't know when I move back to America I was eating out a lot like the first six months and I came a lot of weight like I gained like 20 pounds then I cut it off immediately I don't know I just like don't trust restaurant food it's I mean I like it like I will eat out like if it's like a special occasion or like I think I go out to eat like four times a month so I definitely do but just not like every night I don't like door dash my dinner or I cook everything I don't have a door dash account and I don't have an Uber Eats account that's like my biggest flex like I just don't believe in it oh that's so great yeah when I was actually in London about eight months ago I made an Uber Eats account to like get food at my Airbnb and it was one of those old school Airbnb's where like the host was actually like living

25:05there and I was like in the flat with her oh my god that happened to me it feels weird it feels nostalgic I'm like this would be like a investor with like fake IKEA artwork but she was like in the kitchen with me and I ordered food from Uber Eats because I got in like super late and I ordered like these like beef noodles and she was just like you could just got sat she like literally she was American actually so there wasn't like a weird cultural difference or whatever but she was like I don't use those because I always lived in a city where there's restaurants walking distance oh my god it was kind of shady because I was like well everyone does it like and I do it when I need to but then I started thinking about that and I was like yeah like I should just like go out walking and find something so I don't really do it I I do like the restaurants and I like living near them like I love knowing that like top restaurants are near my home like it just feels nice and like a luxurious thing but I don't really eat out that much and also I've been talking about it

26:07a lot but like all the restaurants in LA like I feel like TikTok has ruined everything like you can't go to restaurants like it's like good luck like there's a restaurant that is walking distance to me that opened like two months ago called wilds and I could literally walk there maybe like a 15-minute walk from my apartment and I mean good luck getting a table there like it's just every night there's like you have to wait like six hours there's that new restaurant in Larchmont called like Max and Helen's where people are waiting like eight hours to try this like gentrified diner food I don't know it's wait is it the waffle yeah it's like it's just things like that like neighborhood restaurants it's like good luck going to them if you live in the neighborhood I mean it's just impossible but I do love living next to so many things and I try when I do go about one of my New Year's resolutions this year was to like try more like mom and pop food because I feel like that's what makes LA really special so I'll drive to like Koreatown to like a Peruvian spa and get like a rotisserie chicken

27:08with like really great green sauce and plantains and all the things I love and it's just also just way more affordable and easier and it's just more rooted in like the culture of LA I feel like so I enjoy that a lot totally also go to Koreatown for a crane food and they have like the best crane food yeah yeah if you could swing the parking you should definitely do it um but I I don't know like last week literally last week Friday I was walking to this like vintage showroom in Melrose Hill which is like a new neighborhood that was created like three years ago from a developer and I was going to this appointment that I had and it's right near telegram and etra and I just like walked past this like beautiful looking mom and pop Guatemalan restaurant and it had like all the food and the menu items like on like you know a cool graphic on the window and I was like I see here like I don't need like very expensive highbrow food and like natural wine like

28:11this is great like I can just have like a nice like breakfast plate here and I've never had Guatemalan food so it's like things like that really excite me so I try to make space in my diet for those things but um yeah L.A. is interesting what's your diet consisting of right now like what uh putting it down predominantly just whole foods so nothing ultra processed um yeah it's pretty strict um but it's it's great I love it and I love being in control of what I eat and that's one thing I really love about L.A. is you have excellent produce and great farmers market so that's a huge thing that I would have to get like get used to not having if I were to ever leave um because I'm so used to that now just like growing food and going to the farmer's market and having everything so accessible and fresh um so yeah yeah I keep seeing like series of you like just going to like the farmer's market and just like oh um I guess it's the weekend like I don't even need to know

29:16like it's Sunday what day it is because it's like if you just like wake up like seeing someone going to the farmer's market on like social media yeah I love it so much I I mean the one thing I hate is it's very expensive and I don't understand why and I'll never understand why and I hate the theater of like how expensive it is but um I think I've gone to the farmer's market every weekend for two weeks or for two years unless I'm traveling um every single weekend I go and I just get all my food for the week or half of what I eat in the week all my produce and then this past summer I was in Amsterdam and I went to like a big farmers market there which is like their biggest like most aesthetic one and everything was so cheap it made me so mad like strawberries were like 85 cents and I'm like this is it's cheaper than the supermarket there which is already much cheaper than American supermarkets and I was just like this is how it should be you cut out the middleman and it should be cheaper it shouldn't be more expensive it's crazy I love that model but I also

30:23feel like even the supermarkets that do that will just like slowly creep up and be like yeah you know there's a way that we can make more money it's really I just came across something where someone said I think we are now in the era and age of we know too much right and so when people know too much it's like that's when things start to get a lot hairier like for an example in green there's like a river that's like pretty cancerous and like people tons of people living green what and like they would have never known that before and like in Williamsburg like that's all radioactive and then people have like found out about it and now it's like well you can't really move so it's like okay I don't want to know any of any any of this and then so it's like when people are um they really do hope that when people do cut out the middleman

31:27for say that like they are doing it for the greater good and just like know that okay it's benefiting someone like yeah it is kind of I mean yes right now the world is it's really hard to stay positive what's everything that's going on yeah I mean I don't know when I'm not going to not say that to be honest with you but like for an example did you hear that like poly market it's like a prediction um model recite like call sheet they're basically gambling what like sites and they opened up a free grocery store in New York City for the week and the worst part about it's like so disgusting because the people are lining up for it are like like low income like yeah and it's just like so messed up because it's just like or yeah so just so be in and yeah it's basically like a food bank and I just don't understand like where we're heading like where

32:27our heads are heading right now yeah yeah like who's like signing on to all this stuff like who's like giving the green light it's like there's some evil person back there that's like giving the green light me like yeah this is a great idea like is anyone not stopping any of the these like bad ideas it's like there's so many access money that's being like thrown into the wall like I take all these meetings with like CpG people and yeah everything behind the scenes and they're like yeah just companies like throwing tons of money to like experiment and it's like well and they're not moving forward with it I'm like you could have solved world hunger by now I think about that all the time I think yeah it's that there's so much to that like I New York is really I lived there for nine and a half years so I I've like seen it all I lived in bedside and Bushwick but I I've seen it all there especially in COVID in 2020 like how dystopian

33:33things got and just like just how much inequality there is in L.A. I think maybe has an even beat to be honest within the inequality department yeah like they opened the Noma outpost in my neighborhood like right next to my daughter's school which is crazy and it's like $1,500 a plate or something or like a serving or whatever and it sold out within like minutes for like the entirety of the residency yeah and every day I see people digging in trash in my neighborhood for food and you know it's like the the contrasts are very intense and it's hard to see as like a empathetic person like people just don't care about it I guess but I'm like I really do and it's hard for me to witness every day especially when you're like going to get like an eight dollar matcha and like there's someone literally like digging in trash right in front of the seating like it's just weird to me and not normal and it could all be fixed really easily I feel like

34:36it could be it could be we we can't we have to stop coming after the eight dollar matches I saw eight dollar matches okay um but Noma on the other I uh I uh for a plate of food that we have to stop like that yes yeah yeah even when I went to Copenhagen when Noma was still open I was like yeah I don't care I like truly do not care um I love Copenhagen so much he seems like you're a European girl for sure I think I I definitely am I just can't live there it's hard I I need sun and I need like right outweigh the expressions and loud noise and I don't know I um I do love the lifestyle though like I do love a lot of it and I love the aesthetics very much and like the policies and things like that the policies I I feel like we say that the same uh London Airbnb to be honest with you but I don't want to

35:38even bringing back those memories because it was truly was it in Hackney I I can't remember quite too often all I remember is that like I was going to Jamie XX and he had like a string of dates and I like offered the Airbnb like a ticket because I had an extra ticket and she was like no and I was like okay I guess this this chick is like not cool but like the whole like split apartment thing to have is the most craziest thing like yeah well it does feel like a old concept I used to always come to LA like 10 years ago when I lived in New York and Airbnb's were like $50 for a room back then and I would stay actually in my neighborhood now like I like there's so many houses around like that was an Airbnb I stayed in there I stayed here like I have so many memories and like I'm rearing them apartment buildings in LA because I'm like yeah I stayed there for like two nights in like 2017 and there was always host like in the apartment and then like one time I came to LA from my 24th birthday with a friend from Houston actually she flew

36:43in met me at the airport in LA and I flew from New York and she got into a fight with the host and like got banned for life from Airbnb and but she literally was like throwing shit at him and like just like a lot of like Houston hood shit you know but it was so it was hilarious like she is like my high school friend like I don't hang out with her very often anymore but she was like I'll come I want to go to LA too and I was like okay let's go like let's go and then so she got into a fight and we were actually near USC and like our host was like a graduate student or something like that and she literally like through stuff at him like they were like it was actually kind of funny because he was like I was just like collateral I was a standing there and then she was like my friend is smart you're mistreating us because she's white and she tried to make it like a racism thing like she was like and she was like she like went to Harvard and I didn't go to Harvard and he was just like I doubt that and I was like well excuse me

37:50and then she got banned and she's like banned from every app like she's banned from Uber and Lyft to like from everything so that was actually one of my favorite trips I actually would love to write a movie about that because that's actually so funny I can see I can see writing a movie it's a real style yeah about this so bad like 824 it's very 824 coded HBO max for sure but I love LA not yeah for sure yeah but it is weird when the host is there and I like the house I'm trying to buy in Houston it would be like that because I'm looking at places that have like you could cut it off and have like one side be Airbnb and the other side be like where I live and I'm like that would probably make people so uncomfortable but like I might have to do it if I'm like in town or something but if you're not in the building yeah fine I think that like if you're not in the common space or like in your room that's completely fine if you're like in the

38:52backyard in your separate home or whatever like like a hobbit like that's completely fine yeah oh my no like for some odd reason your teens like love to live with you and like think like you're the roommate I'm like that's not how Airbnb works your own where I'm from it's like investment yeah exactly are you making money because this makes it sound like you're I'm like losing control um I going back to your harbor friend I think it's interesting in this day and age that uh like more so the culture has changed that if you went to Princeton or Columbia or harbor these are these yes this is a their prestigious schools congrats but there are a lot of people coming out of their schools just like

39:54you know not necessarily hurt but like there are a lot of people coming out of their schools throwing shit so it's like what is going on it's like it's like somehow I'm sure she's you know doing well but I also have like friends that are coming out of these schools but like they're doing like they're like quitting their other jobs and they're trying to do the same layout as like people that didn't go to school yeah like I don't even understand this it's like yeah they're using not using it as like a case study per se but they're like trying these new quote unquote new things but can go back to a gig if they want to or if they try to but uh like is has tradition been lost or like are we going the other way like what's going on what's your take like in terms of higher education it's like higher education yeah and climbing

40:55even going up the corporate status is like do you start your own studio do you like do you listen to your heart like what's going on here well yeah I I don't know I feel like a bit of both like I feel like I don't really like where I went to school I don't know if it's really helped me or not I don't I don't really personally know if it's like the cause for like why I do well or whatever um I feel like it definitely taught me things like I learned a lot about things but I don't know about like especially about what I do because I do what I studied so it's not like I I just came up with something else but I do feel like there are so many other ways to just like be in the right places and like I feel like you don't really need that anymore but I I'm a huge education fan I I love school for the sake of like learning and less for like opportunities and work but um I do wonder like where that's going to go especially as things get more expensive and that's like AI and all that stuff starts to really take a hold on everything I feel like I don't

42:00know I I do feel like I know I feel like there's value in that but I also think that like you know maybe not as much anymore right it's it's something the question for sure it's it's funny that when you say that yeah I went to school and I did the things I'm doing the thing that school taught me aka a major when I tell people that they're like oh you're unicorn I'm like what that's the bare minimum for yeah one like ever you've lost your way I'm sorry and like you need to find your way back onto the track because yeah that's like yeah I mean I don't understand why it has to be so common to like do like pay for higher education and then just dropping out you're still yeah want like make it make sense a little bit and I understand I get it you want to try new things but like that's not the way to go whereas like today it's so interesting because

43:08what's what's really what's really cool is that you have all these like new platforms and like there's a stack right and like people are just learning from a sub stack yeah yeah I mean I I do love like where that's like one of my favorite things about social is that I feel like it connects everyone and there's so many ways to like create like an ecosystem for yourself without having to like have these formative things like education and things like that but I do think that I don't know I I love the idea of like still going to school and like having this sort of like educational background that no one can take from you but I think that I don't know if it's as relevant for everyone anymore and I think there are so many ways to kind of go out there and like share your opinions and share your values and and things like that and maybe there's too many ways to do that to be honest if I'm 100% honest I feel like maybe we need to like dial it back a little bit in like terms of like social and where that's headed but I think there's

44:09so many ways to like foray into things without like school or anything like that it's like people want to be weird but don't go too weird yeah and I don't know being a dropout used to be considered cool but now it's like if so many people are dropping out it just kind of sounds like a failure yeah it's done and all for the wrong things and then people just you know yeah I'm trying to adapt every day to like what someone is doing like a something comment or just like being for facing on social media or just like content creating and all of the things that you used to think that were lame are like okay but where's the threshold like you know when

45:09you see like a regular normal normal person uh that goes on and says oh gay keeping's cool again I'm like who are you like you know what do you like I didn't know you were like the keeper yeah like the authority yeah authority like who who's to say it's like whatever happened to thinking for yourself um instead of just like following everyone um so I don't know I I don't know where to go next to being like I hope this all changes for the better but I'm I'm gripping I'm like on the edge of my seat being like okay well I'm not gonna try to say like I have a lot of friends that have told me you have the look of like I told you so yeah without saying this I'm like well you didn't see it coming yeah yeah yeah I don't know I really like

46:18I don't know I feel like I've always just been like I'm pretty chronically online and I think it is something that I'm trying to work on actually but I do feel like it's really I like knowing what's going on I like knowing like how people are thinking how people are addressing how people are like where people are going things like that so I feel like there are so many benefits if you like do it in moderation or you like have you know a pulse on like how heavily to go all in online but I think that um you know it definitely does add value to like be in the know and I think being in the know is also like a cool thing I think I would never get keep people against like being in in the know of everything me either if you want to know I will gladly tell you but I won't come out of the work and just tell you yeah yeah exactly I mean I'll just drop gems here and there but sometimes I don't want to act like Jen acts boomer style you know I there's I have caught

47:20myself being like back in my day like I will never say that shit right but I will try to help someone in need yeah I mean I definitely don't get keep things like I feel like I get I don't know I maybe I do I don't know I feel like I get a lot of people people will ask me things or like where is this or like and I don't hide it I tell them so I don't know I feel like it's fun to share information and like not pretend to be like too good for things or um that's something that I don't like about LA New York actually like going back to our previous conversation like how many things are gatecaps I hate it like I hate it like there are so many things here that are like private clubs and like you don't get the address or like and I'm like this is so stupid like I mean come on and it doesn't benefit anybody I feel like there are so many people here who like

48:24need opportunity that need access to you know culture and amenities and things like that and it just like keeps people out like there's this I'm not going to name them but there's this like recreational collective which is so weird but it's like you keep nature that's also weird to begin with like um and I know exactly yeah and I'm like what is this it's like I'm like you're gate keeping the park I mean come on but they like it's like a hiking trail running etc etc club and they have this like event space and it's like it has its own Instagram but they don't put the address they just put the neighborhood and like no one knows where it is unless you're invited to an event there there's not to single that collective out but there's like 50 of them in LA where it's like this is a book club but you don't know where it is and I'm just like this is stupid like things like that don't exist where I'm from so I enjoy that you know Alyssa I knew exactly all of everything that you said because you're in yeah I'm

49:26dialed in I'm so dialed into the point that like I know exactly everything that you just mentioned right then yeah and it's like what's the point of like having an Instagram account for it like showing it if you're not going to tell people where it is or how they can access it it feels a bit like cat and mouse and it just feels mean to me I don't know maybe because I'm so nice I'm like this is so stupid like just like invite people and serve the neighborhood and like you know those things are important to me and I feel like we're becoming a very anti social society in that way and people are really gatekeeping like access to things and people are also like very into showing that they have access to things but not giving up like where it is or how they got access to it and I hate that I hate it so much yeah it's not good not good at all and it I don't know how it just feels elitist to me and I don't like it yeah I mean what isn't though yeah everything is it's in everything so that's something that I've always

50:27talking about because I'm like I just like don't want to be involved in shutting out other people or anything like that there's this weird fine line now but it's like elitist and like you know there's private equity just running everything and it's just like where can you go to shut shut it all out like where's the where can you just tone down the noise maybe it is Houston maybe it's it's it's I the only issue that I have with these places like Houston and Philly is that um that it's the reason why I left yeah you know and so to go back like of course I missed these places of course yeah but it's if when I go back I don't think it's going to change per say for I mean for me um and that's why sometimes I crave to go back into this crazy mess but that's like you know even with gay keeping nature and whatnot it's like these are the types of brands

51:34and people that are like destroying the word community and just using as a buzzword yeah yeah um but I don't even know anymore because it's even in my backyard it's even my own friends that are doing the same thing and I can't like I mean I'm talking mad smack about them like literally all the time yeah um but will it go like will it get back to them of course not because there's this other world where I'm still championing them and they're championing me but the thing is like am I dipping into being a hypocrite or not or is this just part of the cycle and we we don't know we don't know will we win who's to say yeah I mean I I yeah I think it's somewhere in between so I always say that like one thing I like about Houston is that there's not a soho house and I feel like that like that's where it comes from like that's like the master of all of this bullshit is like that organization and that company but I think that like when you don't have

52:38that in a society like it's just so much more accessible and um I totally get you like a lot of my friends a lot of people that I know do these things too and sometimes I do them too like if I get invited to something I'll go but I feel weird about it I just don't like I don't like any of that and there's so much of that in LA and I feel like there's always been that in LA like decades ago with like clubs or parties whatever but now it's like this sort of offline community gate keeping it's just so crazy and you're right they do throw around the word community a lot in these places and um it's like what good is a community if no one can get access to it like what is that and um it's like what I said earlier is like what good is a neighborhood restaurant if the neighborhood can't come or like half the people the neighborhood can't afford like the you know 40 dollar entree like what is it for you know who is it for and I feel like people should just be more self-aware about like asking that question because I feel like as we progressively become the more

53:40divided society it's just like not great to like ice people out or not have something that everyone can access or that people can really benefit from where you are or where you're like planted or whatever so I don't know I think about that all the time and I enjoy being in places where there those things don't exist but at the same time like I also do love the fact that those things do cultivate a lot of culture and a lot of like opportunity and things like that and I like to be around those things too so it's a kind of like a I'm in between both I feel like I mean I know that this is a question for a politician but like what do you think is our solution like uh maybe like a brainstorming solution to like all of this more clubs more even the wise coming after us you know it's yeah what what do you think I mean I think it's just like more clubs also just like not making things so private like put the address

54:44on the internet and let people come like what's wrong with that and I think there's just this idea that if something is accessible then it loses value which I guess is true in a lot of ways but I think that we've gone too far into that I feel like um there are so many ways to still have something that's super valuable and super cool and creative and people can come and I don't think it has to be one or the other I think just like stoking this sort of anticipation and kind of telling people like you know what it is but you'll never be able to come because you don't have like the full information I feel like that's just petty and I don't really like that at all and I see that all the time here like every day on the internet I see something new and I'm like oh like I don't know I feel like the solution is just to like make more and just like tell people where it is like invite people and actually like be a part of the community and stop using community as a buzzword that's a really big thing I think post-COVID that a lot of people are getting very like

55:46just getting away with is the idea of like community being this buzzword and it's like what is that you know um I don't know I just don't like it like what do you like uh I know that like in L.A. you love your home which is great um let's let's uh look on the other side what do I like um I like um I don't know I love walking so I do a lot of walking I love shopping um I love sourcing vintage and in curating things and and design and things like that I love art um which I love that art is not very gate kept here like there's so many galleries there's obviously like freeze happening in a few weeks and um a lot to see um I love restaurants like for cafes like I love going to restaurants for coffee and just like sitting I love people watching I love being inspired by the people that I see on the streets and in the things I see I love the streets like I

56:50know that's a two weird thing to say but I love the streets it's why I'm always outside I love like the flowers the colors the like weird things like the random like fruit salesperson like with like cool colors on their cart like I love all those things so I'm always outside just trying to like look at those things and um pull inspiration from them I love I love driving around like I love nature I love the beach I love the mountains so I'm in the right place for that um which is why I hate when things are gate kept I have to do with those things in particular like when I first move to LA I wanted to do this I hike by myself like several times a week and I there's this like hiking club that was really popular on the internet and I tried to go and like they wouldn't release the address of like the meetup point and I was just like really like are you gatekeeping like a hike like from people um and it made me so sad so I like went and I was like never doing this again I'm

57:51just gonna hike by myself because it's just like stupid and it's like just cloudy and um like content based and like not real community and um I don't know I just I love those things and I love that they're all accessible and I hate when people make them inaccessible yeah well the one thing I agreed with can agree with you on is uh cafe restaurants when they have like a coffee shop inside the restaurant I think there's a thing that coming back full force I love sitting at the bar and just like chatting up with like the way like like the wind yeah staff yeah but but their coffees ass honestly they can't do it right honestly yeah it's like that restaurant I mentioned earlier it's hard to get a table for dinner but then they're a cafe until 1 p.m. every day and that's accessible right like I enjoy that um yeah I think it's special I think it's special to be able to just sit outside and and meet people and people watch I mean I lived in Europe where like you go

58:55to cafes and like no one talks to you and so I enjoy just being able to like have random conversations and meet people that way I've met a lot of actually really cool people that I see on my walks and um if I see them around town like I know exactly where they're from and like where I met them and it creates a sense of community that I think is really special still um like going to the bar and sitting and having a drink or you know talking to the bartender things like that well hats off to you and everything that you do for some just are where many has solutions Alyssa do you think that art is just too high um no I don't actually I I don't know I I I'm not high brow at all and I try not to be um but I do think that like yeah maybe it is I hope not I'm just asking only because the fact that you know when you go out to a spot even if you go to a mom pop spot like there's just some inclination in your brain that's going

59:59what but it also could have this I do that sometimes I do yeah I'm like they should be designed the interior like I do think that a lot about not just mom and pop places but like when a place has bad interior there's this coffee shop I go to in Houston that I actually really love and it looks like it's 2003 on the inside and it's like an internet cafe like it looks like that and it's not aesthetic there's no one like taking content of their coffee or like there's no line around the block for some special like fig matcha whatever it's just like feels like it's 20 years ago in there and coffee is like $3 and it's just so easy and I notice it because I'm so like in silver like most of my time and I see like people like taking photos of all their coffee and like lining up and like you go to coffee shops here and people are walking and filming and you're just like collateral in footage and without your consent also I don't know I enjoy like when things are sometimes not that way but sometimes I'm like they should they should update this they should

1:01:02like come into the modern day and can like make it more contemporary but sometimes I enjoy when things are not like that actually me too I think the like that's the problem is that if you have to turn up the if you turn up the heat like and you add like a pop of color or just like an additional menu item it starts to like trip and then like you then you'll have like people coming in they find out about this and then sharing it and like that's just how it goes and we can't stop it yeah for sure I try I mean that's kind of one thing that I am trying to not be high brow about because I know it's just like the world that we live in but just like the tick-tockification of everything especially in my neighborhood I feel so old when there's like 20 year olds with like you know keychains of like stuffed animals on their purses and they're like lining up for like three hours to try like a drink at a coffee shop and I'm like I just want coffee it doesn't have to

1:02:04be inaccessible like that creates inaccessibility right like when someone who just wants to buy something can't because everyone is making content of it or like lining up for hours and like kind of making a bigger deal than it actually is and I don't know even just like how places aren't cozy anymore like there's just like this very and I know I said I love like Copenhagen but there's this very Scandinavian interior everywhere that's very minimal it's very like hard to stay in all day it's like designed for you to come film content and leave there's no like I don't know I just want to bring back like cafes with like sofas and like rugs and like textiles and a fireplace I don't know I just think that's so nice I love sofa cafe yeah I don't know about a rug cafe yeah you would like spill your matcha I love the coziness I want more of that I think

1:03:05in a cafe well so where is a place you like to go to hang your hat a place you like to go to get ideas or a place you like to go to celebrate your wins I would say to that I would say I don't know I love hiking like I said I do it like four times a week and it's like where I do most of my thinking and most of my reflecting and I don't know I just kind of think about my life a lot when I hike and I love that I get that like time because I'm not on my phone I'm not scrolling when I do that obviously so that's really nice I don't know I think like also just like museums like I love the getty I'm not there that often because very far from where I live but just being able to kind of be perched above the city and like see everything I just really think there's something really therapeutic about that and just travel like I love going to New York I love

1:04:06going back to Europe every year and just like seeing a lot of things and seeing how people live and how people dress and that's just always something that really invigorates me so yeah that's sweet like streets yeah the streets it's always back to the streets the streets yeah I that's why I don't want to like move back full time to where I'm from is I really enjoy like the inspiration that you get from the streets here yeah if you were to get a chest tattoo quote what would it be a chest tattoo quote so I don't have any particular quote that I'm like thinking hard about right now but there is a tattoo and I haven't gotten a tattoo in like 10 plus years but there is a tattoo that I really want to get soon and my kid drew this like unicorn creature when she was like three like three years ago and it looks like a boscowat like creature like it just looks right abstract and I want to get it tattooed because it's just really cool and like

1:05:07boxy and the horn is like weird and I really am thinking about getting that tattooed my state that it's on like a post-it note actually she drew it on like a post-it note so it's like something that I have to like say really carefully but I don't know quote I don't know I've like kind of what about you I don't know oh it changes every time yeah it changes every time it's usually for our listeners to like and off on some type of knowledge to take away from what's going on I know I know one so there's this like saying in the Netherlands and Dutch and it's called Comte Coot and it means like it everything comes becomes good like it look better and I just love that I've thought about tattooing that there actually before I move back like maybe like one word on each arm yeah that's like a very basic like way to kind of keep

1:06:09keep being optimistic and I just love that that was perfect I also think that it's funny that basic in today's language it has also gone out the door yeah everyone's like oh that's basic I'm like you would think but it's not it's not basic it's simple it's simple it's concise yeah Alyssa plug your socials breaking people find you or anything people can find me at Alyssa Nielsen first same last name across like everything I think um yeah thank you so much Alyssa for coming out where many hats it was great to have you likewise thank you for having me Rashad I really enjoyed meeting you and catching up you tell him till next time this is where many hats presented by Jossar and I'm Rashad peace bye

1:07:14yeah we love many hats