3/26 3-2 A Chainsaw For Childbirth

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1:02You probably don't want to hear some of them, so make sure you wash your face in the morning, by the way. The eyelash might live mainly on the human eyelash, and there are eight-legged parasites. Hence the nail. The eight-legged eyelash, exactly. The eight-legged parasites that eat skin and oil, they stay hidden in their hair follicles during the day and emerge at night to eat and lay eggs, and excrete waste. That's why you wash your face in the morning. I guess you're going to get your eyes wet. Do you wash your face in the morning? I put soap and water in my hands, it's like I'm beginning to give a children's song. I put soap and water in my hands, it kind of splashed on my face, but I don't really scrub it, no. I wash my face in the morning. I wake up. Now you're going to. I do. I do my previous to this. You wash your pubes for pubic mites, because they're probably all over the place, too. In the morning, that's a good point. It's probably good and harder for the pubic mites. Yeah, there's less pubes around. Yep. There's some more in porn, not full wolfs, just some porn.

2:06I checked, I have more pubes than eyelashes. I think the volume of hair down there is greater than five. Well, you don't shave your eyelashes either for that amount of trim, you trim them a little bit. Oh, yeah, mine grow a little longer. Really? Yeah. I call them up and it's like browse my brother. Oh, my brother. Oh, the brother, you're saying you're trimming all trim lashes. I'm eyelashes calling. Yeah. Here's squirt-and-tooth-based right now. Yeah, my eyelashes grow. I'm gonna draw. The eyelashes are wearing the mite's result. Yeah, exactly right. Right, yeah. I'm sorry about that. When you get a kidney... Do they stay in the eye then if they hang out with the hair during the day, they go back to the hair, do they just go to the eye and then they'll die? I don't know. You do then, true. There are follicles during the day and emerge at night to eat lay eggs at a scree, excrete waste. Oh, is that the same time you're being devoured by bedbugs? Probably. Cause there's usually 8 million bedbugs in the average world. If you think about little mites everywhere, you couldn't do anything. You know, how does, you would just, if that bothers you, they're all over your body all

3:09the time. Oh yeah, we're full of parasites. When you get a kidney transplant, unless the original organs are diseased, they just leave them in there. What? They leave it in there. They leave old ones in there, old dead kidneys just chilling. This article says, also the fluopia tube. How big is a kidney? Is there room for that? Can you notice that on people? You were. Thanks. They're like an extra lump. I don't know. They just make room. They're a fairly good size organ, aren't they? I mean, also the fluopian tubes are not connected to the ovaries. They just float in the general direction of the ovaries to do their best to vacuum up the eggs so they can get popped out. That's all weird crap. Is that what happens when you have what is called a tubal pregnancy? Tubal ligation, yeah, I think so. Well, I think the eggs and the sperm get into the fluopian tubes, but not further up. Instead of the uterus. Yeah, so they get stuck there and that's a dangerous situation. This woman had it tough.

4:09The man who developed a pap smear, pap smear, uh, was that named pap? Was his name pap? Yeah. That was, that's what his grandkids called him pap, yeah, pap smear. The man who developed a pap smear, uh, did so with the help of his wife who received pap smeers almost daily for 21 years. He tested on his wife. Now, I don't even know what a pap smear actually is. Austin knows. Oh, Austin, what's a pap smear, um, you know, we don't even get them. We just don't know what, do you know exactly what it is, my understanding is, uh, Google pap smear, put a stick kind of some kind of swab up there, but I don't know what they're looking for. It's like a COVID test for your vagina. Okay. That's a good question. It's during a pelvic exam. A healthcare provider uses a small brush to gently remove cells from the cervix to examine under a microscope. This guy did to his wife every day for 20 years. Every day. That's a pap smear. Do you think she liked it? Well, how big is a Q tip?

5:10I mean, I mean, every day for 20 like towards the end of it, you know, uh, have you got this back? Yeah. Right. I'm done. Pap. Is that only you probably be discussing? He's probably like does he put that thing away? I'd watch the original naked gun the other day with my songs. He had never seen the original naked gun. We watched the, uh, the new one and he enjoyed that because he liked that kind of humor he realized. And I go, well, there's an original one and the original one for him, he still liked it. He also liked the new one better because it's updated jokes and stuff like that. But pap smear in the original one is like one of the best names of any any person in any movie. It is. Pap smear. Dr. George. I was raised by that movie. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. Yeah. It was a Greek guy. His name started with Papa. Yeah. He was the first pap smear. We know this by the way. If you got a toothache, that thing could rot through your brain and go to kill you.

6:13So. Oh, that almost happened to me. Probably. Yeah. Yeah. It happens to a lot of people. So I got my root canal. Yeah. I actually went to the dentist. Like I had a root canal. Then one of my other crowns fell off and asked the guy and I'm like, like, how do I just never deal with teeth again? Like, can you hit my teeth out and give me fake teeth? And this guy lit up. He was so excited. Yeah, we can. Can I show you my book? Yeah. And it's like porcelain teeth and they shove like these metal things up there, but they're not. The teeth aren't separated. They're like together. Oh, like a thing. And I'm like, no, I'm like, that's a cheap version. Yeah. No, I mean, it was a hundred grand. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm like, no, I want individual teeth. If I'm going to do this, I can't have all teeth. Number one, I'm never going to do this, but I was so excited that I just really like, you know, I saw a new car coming down to run. Yeah, yeah. He did. He's like, finally, I'm going to get that Aston Martin. I'm going to get this kid's teeth out. But we're told repeatedly that you should not neglect your dental health because it's connected to a lot of other avenues of your health.

7:15I tell you, when you'll get stuff you all the time, he doesn't really care about brushing his teeth. A lot of kids didn't know. He's getting better. The older he gets down, but back in the day, I think a lot of times, the pressure teeth today, the answer be like, well, I did yesterday, I'm like, that's not today. They're a burden. At that age, I remember when I was my teeth a lot as a kid, and I can't imagine that feeling. Like a nine-year-old kid doesn't care. I can't imagine that feeling now because it feels like you have a sweater on your teeth in the morning. That's so gross. Doesn't it feel that way? Can you imagine? Because I remember as a kid, I didn't brush a lot. I had some cavities. And because I was just a kid, you know, my parents didn't stand over the sink and watch me like I did with our kids when they were little. But yeah. I don't know what exactly the correlation is, but there's a connection between your heart health and your dental health. Right. Yeah, that's what they say. A scary number of people wind up with vertebrae, no. Vertebrae, artery, dissections, and strokes from chiropractic cervical manipulations.

8:19Or temporal. I believe it would be the word yours. Thank you. Stumbling for. How do I know? I mean, several perfectly healthy women in the prime of their lives, uh, they're dead. Uh, so. Whoa. That's the kind of practice. What is those? I don't know. This is a cervical chiropractor. So I don't know if that's the, they do that in the, that's the neck. Yeah. The history. I listen, I know chiropractor's work and I, not going to hammer chiropractor here. I went to one for a while and I just couldn't let myself get cracked. I was just, I fought it. And then when I fought it sometimes, I realized, I'm, that's not good. I couldn't ever, and then once and why you would crack it, I didn't like the sound of it again. And plus it didn't help. But I realized it wasn't my back. It was hurting. It was other stuff. But, uh, I just, I just feel weird about it. I just don't like it. You know, crack like that. The history of chiropractor, the history of chiropractor, yeah. Started in Denison, Iowa. Did it really? Yeah. There was a family. And there were a family of, uh, weirdos that would, they were grave robbers.

9:23So they would wait for someone in the village, because I'm sure at this time, it was a village. That was deformed, you know, had like a hunch or something like that. And then they would dig them up, rob them, and then work on their bones. And it was said that, um, you know, they cracked this one guy's neck that was like deficit entire life. Then he could hear, and, um, what year was that? And now, uh, there's a one on every blog. Yeah. Yeah. There's one on that. I don't remember the year. I don't remember. I heard this story from a chiropractor. He gave like a presentation. I believe it was. It wasn't really about that. He just skipped it. But then I was in the crowd. I was like, tell me more about them digging a punch backs. Where were you with it? They didn't want it. They're giving a presentation. Oh, you know, uh, networking group. I got turned off to it because one of the chiroprakers I went to, you could tell he was just doing it too. He wanted you there on a regular basis. Oh, it's a money grab. Yeah. There are so many. You just come in whenever you come in on occasion, but a lot of them want you to come three

10:26times a week. Oh, we had a baby. Yeah. Madison was like a baby. And they wanted me to bury her in. I said, no. No, you're not going to crack my baby. And I, at least at the time, my stuff like step on a crack. My insurance didn't cover. And get a shake or two. Are there other insurances that cover cover practice? Probably now. Yeah. Yeah. It does work for a lot of people. I have to go there sometimes. Sometimes your neck gets stuck. Yeah. I'm not hammering. It works. I just didn't want to do it after a while. I've read this before, but I don't know why they would use it. Maybe for a really hard, a peasy, but chain saws were invented originally for child birth. I'm guessing it's not the size of chain. No, I'm looking at one right now. I'm looking at one in this photo. It looks like a smaller version. Yeah. But it is a chain saw. I mean, the chain goes around the blade and looks like you just, so that's, it's probably more of a, yeah, a boner sized one. No, no. What would they use in it for during child birth? For child birth.

11:27Probably to crack it open a little bit. For the apesia. I mean, this is, this is chain saws. This looks like mediocre. It should be medieval, medieval, or mediocre, yeah, medieval. Chain saws were invented for child birth. Oh, that is crazy. Look that up, push. I went wild with the chain saw last night. Oh, you do it. Oh, no, vagina. I couldn't down trees. This one's kind of funny. The first doctor that suggested washing your hands, battery powered chainsaw. I bought one yesterday in Milwaukee. I have a gas powered chain saw. Upgraded to the battery one. But yesterday, it's the greatest decision I've ever made. Battery powered chainsaw that I love to take on camera trips because if you see a down tree, yeah, it's incredible for China, right? Yeah. How long does the battery last? Other campers get into their tent. You have a birth in here. Yeah. Weirdo's in Denison, Hunchbacks. Yeah. On a four or five day camping trip, I probably have to recharge it once. Where do you plug it in? Oh, well, if there's a source like my buddy has a trailer, it has electricity.

12:31Oh, plug it into something like that. I went to the battery powered mower a couple years ago, and I love that thing. Yeah. So you actually just, you saw it, you see a tree and you just, you just help it along and it's death. Yeah. It's firewood. Oh, no. Oh, firewood dog. Sorry. It would be a, yeah. So we'll take this. We'll take care of this for you. I like cutting the paper. He's got a heart for dead trees. Does that just want to be on the ground? No, you're going to. Well, he beats deer with one, you know? Don't drop down live trees. I know. You'll see a dead log on the forest floor. I know what I'm like. You go after with an axe, so you just take your chains on. What's an electric one cost? All sticks. I think I do what need one. Um, well, the Milwaukee one at most places is $3.29, but at Home Depot right now, it's $249. You're going to save $80. So you're going to want to go there directly after this show. All right. I mind you. Thank you. You won't. No, but I need one.

13:32I used to borrow one from my brother long. Everyone needs one. Yeah. Everyone needs one. I'm very surprised that you chainsaw things. I have. I've changed. Well, I would have first moved into the house, I had to cut down a couple trees. I'm surprised you don't have a chainsaw guy. No, no chainsaw guy. Yeah. You can get yourself a nice rio bee. I mean, you can fly me out there. I'll be your chainsaw. Yeah. Hardless chainsaw. I've got a fun, actually. Yeah. 200 bucks. We were shirtless in my yard. Battery time to chainsaw. I'll be your pool boy too. Yeah. That's good. Yes, you will. It's Austin doing wearing a speedo cutting down trees. She's my new pool boy. You're never. You're just throwing leaves into the pool. She's like, get those ones. Here's the net, pool boy. Yeah. Watch out for the wood chipper though. Yeah. He's your liberal. Right. Yeah. That's the buddy in the wood chipper there. Yeah, the wood chipper is for when he gets tires of his pool boys. Austin has it retired from comedy. You guys ain't coming up, Austin? Yeah, man. I got some shows tomorrow night. I'm opening for Whitney Cummins at the end of the show. Oh, you are.

14:32Yeah. Well, that's cool because Whitney's calling today. Oh, she is nice. Yeah. No, she's calling. Oh, she's calling late. You won't be here. You didn't know that push. No, we just said, hey. No, no push. No. And then I'm opening for in Des Moines 2 on Saturday. How'd you get that gig? I know you're through after the break. Through. Hold it back. Hold it back. Hold it back. Hold the break. Pull boy, hold on. Hold on. This is the Todd and Tyler Ready One buyer.