3/16/26 NACHOO'S REVENGE - DOUBLE TROUBLE

0:00Springtime is almost here, and if you've been itching to redo every room in your home, Bob's discount furniture can help. When you shop at Bob's, you get wow-worthy everyday low prices on fabulous furniture for every room. Everything from stylish mid-century dining sets and top-rated bubble-pedic mattresses with the best warranties in the business, to pop up sleeper sectionals all for a fraction of what they cost elsewhere. So, stop inner shop online and get wow-worthy pieces for less. Only at Bob's. Well, many thanks, good sir. Here is my Discover Card. They accept a discover at Renaissance Fairs? Yeah, they do here. Discoverers accept it at the places I love to shop. Get it with the times! With the times! You're playing the loot. Yeah, and it sounds pretty good, right? Discoverers accept it at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. Based on the February 2025 Nilson report, testing season is right around the corner,

1:00and this is when confidence really matters. When kids take time to review key concepts and strengthen their skills before assessments, it can make all the difference. IXL helps reinforce what they're learning right now, so they walk into every test feeling prepared, capable and confident. IXL is an award-winning online learning platform that helps kids truly understand what they're learning, whether they're building math confidence, strengthening reading and writing skills, or reviewing science concepts. Designed for students from pre-K through 12th grade, IXL delivers personalized interactive practice that adapts to your child's level and pace. It's an easy, effective way to support learning as the school year heads into its final stretch. Studies show kids who use IXL score higher on tests, proven in all 50 states. IXL is used in 96 of the top 100 school districts in the US. Make an impact on your child's learning. Get IXL now, and listeners can get an exclusive 20% off IXL membership

2:01when they sign up today at IXLLearning.com slash audio. Visit IXLLearning.com slash audio to get the most effective learning program out there at the best price. So, we'll start for everybody's favorite prank calls, start for nachos, revenge with the morning mask, and we say good morning to Jordan. Hey, good morning, Jordan. Good morning, everyone. Jordan, we hear that you need some revenge on your friend Monica. What happened? Yes, my friend Monica, my so-called friend Monica, does not deserve to be in a relationship. For sure, it would be a bad mom, but she is one. Jesus. Yeah, it's aggressive. I've been talking with this girl for like a month, my friend Monica was like, oh, we should double date. And in my heart, I knew that was a bad idea. But, you know, I said, all right, through it. Look, I've known Monica for a very long time, right? Basically, we grew up together like childhood friends.

3:04Uh-huh. So, we're at dinner, Monica starts drinking and there's too many cocktails, and she starts talking, my girl's ear off, starts showing her photos, showing her videos, and then a photo of my ex popped up, and Monica starts talking about how, you know, how long it took me to get over her. I don't know. So, long story short, I can hear back from my day for like two weeks. And when I did, she's giving me, oh, Monica made it sound like you're not over your ex. I'm uncomfortable. This is going to work out. So, Monica, like, wrecked my shot with this girl and she deserves all this milk. I think Monica is into you. I think she ruined that date. Oh, that's just my love, Therry. Ooh, like, she sabotaged it. Are you sure she doesn't have feelings for you? I feel like we're more like a brother's sister to her than, uh, the only one. I don't know. People in Kentucky date their brother's sister. So, where is she from? Uh-huh. It wasn't her. It wasn't her, I think it was her. Northerner, okay. All right.

4:04So, she definitely see blocked you. So, what are we thinking for the prank call? All right. So, I thought it's not show because, like, be from the restaurant and say the person seemed behind her saw a nude photo of me, and now she's permanently banned from the restaurant. I'm just headroomed for this. I'm like, does she have some nude pictures of you? Yeah, that was part of the uh, slide show she was showing my date. What the hell is going on here? Yeah, what is happening? What is going on? Okay. See this? This was mine. It can never. Let that mezcal talk it. Okay. You know what? He doesn't know. Who's going to tell him? Yeah. Who's definitely who's going to tell him? Okay. Yeah. Um, so we're going to call your friend and uh, ruin her morning by pranking her. Okay, buddy? Love it. All right. Let's ban her. Here we go. Hello. Hi, good morning. This is not sure if it's not sure if it's not sure if it's two oles with

5:07f**ks and chander. How are you this morning, ma'am? I'm good. How are you? Well, we were doing good until about a month ago. We pretty much just spiraling down since. I'm sorry to get about that. Yeah. I appreciate the apology after the fact an apology would have been pretty useful over the last 30 days or so. So. I literally have no idea what you're talking about. What do you remember when you came in with your Swingers Club last month for dinner? Do you remember that? Swingers Club? Yes. Yeah, no. You have me mixed up with someone else. Nope. Nope. I remember a bad hairstyle when I see it. You might need to go with banks to cover up some of your face with all due respect. That's just from a bar. I noticed, huh? Wait, what the f**k is all this about? Ma'am. Don't ever speak to me like that. We received a bad Yelp review from the table behind you. They said you were speaking loud and showing nude photos to the Swingers next to you. I trust their word and their hairstyle more than you are.

6:07So you know this is this was not me. Like first act. I know that. Ma'am is 2026 and we have cameras. And again, I remember your hair. It was not your best. But I also saw the photo and it matches. So it was you, ma'am. Okay, wait, even if that was true, like I could share whatever I want with whoever I want. That was f**king retoxle. If like some people are behind me looking at my phone. Ma'am, you kept talking about how size matters. What else could it be? Because I know that our portions are huge. But all that can go in that stomach. You are f**king disgusting. Ma'am. You know that's what I'm happy they left you a bad review. You're banned from our restaurant for mobile and decent exposure, okay? Did those Swingers actually think you and your ma'am were attractive? Because I could understand if the lights were off. But at this point, I mean, we was a... I am done. I am done with this f**king retoxle. Ma'am. You're banning me from your restaurant for something I didn't do. Which, you know what? I will just go to a different location. I'm not going to New York. Yeah, okay. I wouldn't do that because we have your face stapled in every door. With the sign that says, if this is you, you can't come in. So I'm all over the valley.

7:09I'm... No. It's my family business. I can't see this f**king real. You better... You know what? You better wall your up. I'm going to take legal action. Okay, I will. Can you send the news that you were showing off to the more attractive woman next to you so we can build our case? Can you do that? Yeah, sure. They're on their way. You know what? No, I don't want her. I need the pictures. Okay. But that's if I get bored, it'll be something to get my blood flowing. You know what I mean? Oh my god. I'm hanging up. You need to be me to f**king alone. I will. Okay, right after I let tell you something. Well, first, can I tell you something real quick before you hang up on me? Just really quick. Seven seconds, okay? Okay. Well, stop yelling at me. First of all, second of all, you are laughing. That's it. You're just going to keep interrupting me. Can I just tell you? What? Can I just tell you really quick? I was just, well, if you shut up, I was just going to tell you live on the radio with a show called The Morning Mess. Your friend Jordan put us up to this prank call. This is off fake. I see you. There's some phone f**king. Not phone. Do you have an edge?

8:09It's really my f**king up with that girl I brought. Oh, come on. You're too ugly for her anyway. She actually does like you. That's playgrounds on. She wants you. Pinch him. Oh, could this vintage store be any cuter? Right. And the best part? They accept discover. Accept discover. In a little place like this? I don't think so, Jennifer. Oh yeah, huh. Discover's accepted where I like to shop. Come on, baby. Get with the times. Right. So we shouldn't get the parachute pants? These are making a comeback. I think. Discover's accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. Based on the February 2025 Nilsen report. I'm Spencer and I work at United Health Care. Suspenser, why do you care? I care because my daughter Adeline has special needs. I am motivated by Adeline who inspires me every day. I am driven to help families like mine navigate the healthcare system.

9:12I'm so blessed to lead an amazing team at United Health Care focusing on the member experience and making that better. I'm Spencer and I'm committed to care. Get more out of every mile when you share the ride to work. With carpooling, you'll have time to relax, save money, and pick up new friends. Commuter connections can help you find carpool partners who live and work near you. Even if you're commuting just a few days a week, it's a free service. Carpooling, every dollar saved, every friend made. Register for free carpool partner ride matching at commuterconnections.org or call 800-745-RIDE. That's commuterconnections.org.